Page 2 of Madness

The slope that took Chloe from me.

It could have been worse, I try to convince myself. I could have done a lot worse.

This was just a little hiccup. I’m fine. I’m totally fine. I can handle it. Outside of my pounding headache, I’m doing alright. I slipped in private, alone, and nobody got hurt. Right?

In fact, the painkillers in this bottle would probably help right now. I need to appear ‘normal’ for the interview with Rolling Stone, not hungover like a typical asshole rockstar.

This is it, though. No more than this. I know my limits and am well aware that I fucked that up last night. It doesn’t have to define me going forward. After this, I can stop. The anniversary of Chloe’s death hit me harder than I thought it would, that’s all. I’m allowed my grief. I just need to make it through today.

Just today.

I dry-swallow two pills, praying they'll fix this hangover. With one last glance in the mirror, making sure I don’t meet my own eyes, I toss the empty bourbon bottle in my backpack, steel myself, and open the bedroom door.

Connor stands there, arms crossed, worry etched across his face. "Jesus, you look like hell."

I force a wry smile. "Thanks, man. Just what every rockstar wants to hear before an interview with Rolling Stone."

Connor's eyes narrow, searching my face. "You okay? I know what day it is. Sorry I wasn’t here last night."

For a split second, I consider coming clean. Telling Connor everything. But the words stick in my throat. Instead, I clap my friend on the shoulder as I brush past him.

"I'm fine. Just slept like shit. I'll grab a coffee on the way."

As I put on my sunglasses and head out, I silently vow to myself that last night will be a one-off. I'll get back on track. For the band. For myself.

For Chloe.

But deep down, a small voice whispers that it might already be too late.

2

HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO

LAUREN

"Lauren, we need to talk."

My cousin Shannon's voice drifts up the stairs as I'm wrestling a brush through my tangled dark brown hair. I check my watch and stifle a groan. It's barely 5:30 AM, and I've got exactly ten minutes before I need to leave for my shift at Sunny's Diner. I usually work dinner only, but I’m covering for someone on vacation this week. My tired eyes are not going to earn me any stellar tips today, I can tell already.

"Can it wait?" I call back, wincing as I hit a particularly stubborn knot. "I'm running late as it is."

There's a pause, then the sound of footsteps in the hall. Shannon appears in my doorway, her red hair wild from sleep, cradling a mug of coffee. The serious look on her face makes my stomach clench.

"It's about Seattle," she says, and my heart sinks. I've been dreading this conversation for weeks.

I set down the brush and turn to face her. "You're moving back, aren't you?"

Shannon nods, her green eyes apologetic. "I got a call from my agent yesterday. There's a part in a new series filming up there. It's not huge, but it's steady work for at least a season. And who knows, it might get picked up for another if we’re lucky. It’s kind of a rom-com. You’re gonna love it."

"That's great, Shannon," I say, forcing a smile. And it is great, for her. She's been chasing her acting dream for years, scraping by on bit parts and commercials. She deserves this break.

But the selfish part of me wants to beg her to stay in LA. Without Shannon, I don't know how I'll manage. She's been my rock since my boyfriend Miles died, helping with my nearly three-year-old son Roman, and splitting the rent on this tiny house.

"I want you to come with me," Shannon blurts out. "You and Roman. We could get a place together in Seattle. It'd be just like here, but maybe with better opportunities for both of us."

I turn back to the mirror, avoiding her hopeful gaze. "I don't know, Shannon. Seattle is..."

"Where your parents are," she finishes softly. "I know it's complicated, but maybe it's time you guys mended fences?"