Page 26 of Mayhem

I meet Tess's empathy filled gaze. "I didn’t even book the fucking trip back. What kind of asshole does that? Just thinks some gift in the mail or a fucking phone call erases all those times you shatter their freaking world."

I expel a harsh breath, regrets layering too deep to dive into completely tonight. But I need her to grasp the man I am, finally fighting his way free from his destructive roots.

She rubs my shoulder gently. “You’re being too hard on yourself.”

“Fuck. It’s not even close to what I deserve.” I meet her gaze, losing myself for a moment. “I was supposed to be the one convincing you I’m not an asshole, and somehow, you’re now trying to convince me. I am damaged fucking goods, Tess. Fuck. Not even goods, just damaged.”

“Well, I only know the Brad Chambers now. Not the Brad Chambers of the past, so I can’t exactly hold that against you.” Her voice is kind, and it makes me bristle. I really don’t deserve someone like her, and I fucking know it in my God damned soul.

“So, Gina didn’t totally scare you off?” I ask, half afraid of the answer. And for some fucked up reason, I let hope spark to life inside of me. “If I were you, I’d be running for the fucking hills by now.”

She’s quiet for a moment, and my heart skips as I hold my breath. If this is it, at least I was fucking honest.

“No.” She smiles, and it lights up the room. My whole world. “It will take a lot more than the likes of Gina to scare me off.”

I let out the breath, and lift her hand to kiss her palm, holding it to my cheek. Fucking hell, my heart is racing.

“Thank you.”

“So long as you’re honest with me, there isn’t much that could scare me.”

“You might be able to survive this industry after all.”

“Hey, I weathered and spun the sex scandal of Ohio’s most popular senator. I can handle some rockstar exes.” Her shoulders straighten with pride, and I can’t help but sense a little fear still lingering under her bravado.

Mentally I promise myself to never give her a reason to doubt me again. She may put on a good front, but I know that deep down she’s just like me, just like everyone else. We all have vulnerabilities and pain that we cover up for the sake of others.

I’ll do everything I can to protect that.

16

TERRIFIED

TESS

Am I fooling myself? Am I so attracted to this man that I’m putting blinders on to the truth of what a reality would look like with him? It’s entirely possible, and lines up with my way of doing things. I like to think I’m a realist when it comes to my personal life, but I’m a dreamer, seeing things that I want to see. Believing things I have zero business believing.

I’ve been burned before by my own nature that way, and I can see that clearly happening here, but for some reason my instinct is kicking in. My heart is overruling my mind, blinding me to all the red flags, and I don’t know exactly what to do with that. I should probably run away as fast as my feet can take me like he said, but there’s something about Brad that won’t let me do that.

I just hope that something doesn’t come back to haunt me later down the road.

“So, date number one…Eventful,” he chuckles, interlacing his fingers with mine. I love how our hands fit together so naturally.

“Definitely memorable,” I say, smiling down at our hands.

“I guess that’s not so bad, then, huh?”

“Not bad at all.”

“Does that mean there will be a date number two?” he asks, and I love the hopefulness in his voice. Something about his tone melts away all the hesitation I’ve been experiencing the last few minutes. It makes me want to see where this goes even more.

“That would be nice.”

“Nice?” he frowns. “We can do better than nice…can’t we?”

My laughter echoes in the large practice space. “Great. That would be great. Fantastic, even. How’s that?”

“Now we’re talking.” He leans over and kisses me gently. Just a brush of his lips whispering across mine. A chill skitters along my skin that is so delicious, I get goosebumps. “Let’s shoot for the stars.”

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