Page 1 of Priceless

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MARIGOLD

MEANING: CRUELTY; DESPAIR; GRIEF

OCEAN

________

“Tighter.”

I swear if that word never came out of my aunt’s mouth ever again, it would be too soon. It was her favorite word, at least when it came to me.

“Ma’am,” Ruby huffed a breath, even more exasperated than I was. “It’s as tight as it will go safely.”

Aunt Laura scoffed. “No, it’s not. We’ve gotten it smaller before, and the dress shows everything. Make it tighter. She has to look perfect.”

I met Ruby’s gaze in the mirror, and I saw the protest on the tip of her tongue. Instead, I gave her the tiniest shake of my head. It wasn’t worth it to fight. If she protested more, Laura would simply take over lacing the corset herself, and it would be far more painful than what Ruby would do.

Sighing, Ruby forced the laces tighter, and I closed my eyes, sinking into a place I already knew well. Behind a glass wall in my own mind, where nothing could reach me and I could ignore the aching pain of my body being forced into something too small for it, and the ache that would fester until after this party when I could finally take it off.

Laura crossed her arms and stared into the mirror triumphantly. “See?”

Neither Ruby nor I said anything as she went to the rack and picked up the dress she’d chosen for the party. Excuse me, the gala. She corrected me every time I said anything different, and it wasn’t worth telling her that her party never compared to the ones my mother threw, and they never would, even if she desperately wanted them to.

Tying off the laces in the center of my back, Ruby helped Laura lift the dress over my head. It fell down in a silky wave. It really was pretty, and I felt pretty in it. Royal blue, with a one-shoulder neckline, it flowed down like water and made me look graceful.

This was where I had to fight myself. Because I loved the way I looked, and I knew that I wouldn’t like it nearly as much without the corset I was stuffed into like that last shirt you tried to fit into a drawer even though it didn’t want to close. But I was still in pain, and I desperately wished I would like the way I looked without the corset. Even with it, I was still fat. There was no hiding that, no matter how small they laced me. Physics were a thing, and my matter could only be compressed so much. And I didn’t have the energy to explain the laws of physics to my aunt.

“There,” Laura said. “That will have to do, I guess. People will start arriving in fifteen minutes. Thanks for making us cut it so close.” Her voice was poisonous. “Make-up, Ocean. Not too heavy. Do not be late.”

She disappeared in a cloud of the powdery perfume she preferred, which I hated, but was better than her natural scent, which was dusty and dry. But not in the good old books way. More like cardboard.

It made sense. She was stiff enough for it.

“Are you all right?” Ruby asked.

“I’m fine.” I sat down at my vanity, hiding the wince and my inability to breathe. At least this dress was long enough to hide wearing flats, because I wasn’t going to be able to sit down much.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

She looked like she wanted to say something else, but thought better of it. “Let me know if you need anything,” she murmured before closing the door behind her.

My shoulders wilted, and I took a labored breath, trying to get used to the tightness. It would be easier if I wore the corsets all the time, like women used to in the past. When Laura told me she wanted me to start wearing them for events because ‘regular shapewear wasn’t going to cut it,’ I went down the rabbit hole. This wasn’t what they were meant for. Corsets were just bras, and the horror stories people used to vilify them either weren’t real, or were so far an outlier they weren’t worth mentioning.

Laura didn’t see it that way, so I couldn’t just wear a well-fitted corset every day and get used to it. If I wore this every day, it would be hell.

Slowly, I eased my breathing and let my body get used to it before I started doing my make-up. I’d make my appearance at the party as short as possible, and then get the hell out of all of this and retreat to the greenhouse. While it was summer, once the sun went down the greenhouse was still lovely in the evenings, with the breeze from the sea flowing through the portion where the windows opened.

I startled at the sound of my phone ringing, squirting a little too much foundation on the sponge. Part of me wished it had fallen on the dress, but I still selfishly liked the dress too much to ruin it.

Isolde’s name lit up the screen. Finally. I laughed as I answered the call and turned it to video, propping it up against the mirror. Trinity hadn’t quite made it on the call yet, so it was just Isolde, cuddled up in a sweatshirt that was way, way too big to be hers. I grinned.

“Finally coming up for air?”

She blushed, but nodded. “Yeah. That was… well, I’ll wait till Rin answers, but it was incredible.”

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