Page 2 of Not Dating Material

“Ooh, big man, throwing around threats. Good luck with that.”

I’m not a violent person, but in times like this, I really wish I was.

Instead, I force one of those ridiculous meditative breaths Madden taught me and close my eyes behind the blindfold. I ignore everything … I want to say Colt? … says and try to stay relaxed until I have a way out of this situation. None of my roommates are home, otherwise, I would have already yelled out.

Nope, it’s just me and the creep.

Who I’m actively trying to tune out. Kinda hard when he’s monologuing harder than a ’90s-era action villain.

“You know, I have a lot of regrets. Now I’ve seen you naked, I wish I didn’t agree to this plan at all.”

I grit my teeth.

“Your body is …” He makes a kissing noise.

I clench my fists.

“But no matter, these pictures will do the trick.” His footsteps move toward the door. “Eddie says hi, by the way.”

Then he’s gone. I listen to him make his way down the stairs and to the front door, but for a second before it closes behind him, I swear I catch another voice.

And footsteps.

Please let it be one of my friends and not some other wannabe photographer with a grudge.

“Hello?” I holler. Sure, I’m not thrilled at one of them finding me dick and balls out, but while I’ll have to endure everyone teasing me for the next few weeks, at least I’ll be free of these cuffs. That’s the great thing about living here. These guys are my brothers; we’ve all been there for each other when we’ve hit rock bottom, and while we annoy the crap out of each other, we don’t judge.

I’d trust these guys with my life.

And, uh, in all my naked glory.

“Hey,” I shout. “Come give me a hand.”

Given Madden, one of my roommates, is a nudist, we’re all used to seeing a bit of peen. It’s more the embarrassment of being so easily manipulated that’s sitting wrong, as well as the … well, the pictures. The helplessness. Urg, don’t think about it.

“Hey, what’s—oh my god!”

Oh nooo.

Out of all the guys I live with, that horrified tone is barely recognizable, which makes it easiest to pick.

Molly. The new guy.

Okay, so not all of my roommates are brothers to me. Gabe didn’t move out that long ago, and Molly is so quiet I forget he’s here half the time.

I try for a winning smile, even though this definitely isn’t a winning scenario, and hope he’s still there. “I’ve gotten myself into a situation.”

“Holy shit.” And he must run across the room because one moment, his voice is by my door, and the next, his soft, cold fingers are pushing up the blindfold, revealing big eyes filled with concern. “Are you okay?”

“How about you ask me that again when I’m not starfishing naked for you?”

“Right. Yes.” He goes to glance downward but rips his eyes back to my face. “What do you need?”

“The keys are in the drawer.” I nod toward my bedside table, and Molly hurries to it.

“How did you end up like this?” he asks, digging through the mess, floppy mop of brown hair falling over his forehead.

“A hookup gone bad.”

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