Page 49 of Bulletproof Baby

"Fuck you, Frankie." I laugh. "This is my life."

"Exactly. You are liv-ing." He snaps his fingers. "You see what happens when you lose your virginity? Your once boring life is now a fuckin’ telenovela. I can't. Come on. Don't sulk. Valentino is going to be a great father. Look at how protective he was over you."

"Fuck, no, Frankie. I can't tell him about this. He'll lock me away in his beach house again."

"Oh no that sounds horrible," he says mockingly. "Put me in a house on the beach in the Hamptons and throw away the fucking key. No bills, plenty of food, wine, and a fine ass man who wants to hide you from the world. Those are pretty girl, first-world problems to complain about. Don't look at the downside of your freedom being taken away, because let's be real for one second. You weren't exactly locked away. You found your way to me pretty easily, which means, freedom."

"You're right, but the danger?—"

He cuts me off. "The danger of you being in New York is way different than the danger of having a man's baby and not ever giving him the option to be included or excluded. That's fucked up, Lia. What if something happens to you and I'm not here? God knows where Zio and Zia are. The feds have them locked up tighter than a king's virgin daughter in a chastity belt."

"Not funny."

"It was, but I know, time and place for everything. Still, are you scared that Valentino wants you along with all of the chaos that's unfolded since you two met? It's kind of scary when a complete stranger just loves you right away and wants to take care of you? Kind of like a cousin from a different country that helps you learn English the way New Yorkers talk and defends you from people who don't understand you."

I nearly balk at the correlation. "That's not the same, Frankie. We're family."

He reaches over to rub my belly. "And if I'm right, which we both know I probably am, you and Valentino are going to be a family too. I'm not saying roll out the red carpet for him to come blow another door off the hinges. I'm saying just let him know. You can even tell him that you're staying here to keep away from the New York drama with that other mob boss. But, if you don't want to tell him because you feel it's too dangerous, I'll respect that too. I don't like it, but I'll respect it."

"Thank you, Frankie. I'm going to tell him. Shit, my phone's been switched off."

Frankie shakes his head. "Don't do that. Valentino Barrone is the C-E-motherfuckin’-O of Barten Security. You can reach him if you want to. If it truly is a matter of safety, you know he's one of the best on this planet to do that. Shit, we should have talked to him before we came out here to Pilsner."

"He would have followed us and there would probably be drones circling."

"And? The man wants to keep you safe. The man wants to love you, but I get it that too much too fast doesn't seem real. I'm not one to talk, but I got your back no matter what you want to do."

And just like that, my world changed…again.

Frankie doesn't stay in Pilsner too long, a few weeks at the most before he hits the road for more urban pastures. Country living isn't the peace he's looking for. We speak often and as the weeks turn into months, I can't ignore the changes happening to my body.

Life isn't hard, but it's not the easiest being alone, and I want to go back to New York. The people out here are friendly, but I don't consider anyone a friend truthfully. I'm cordial and smile every day as people offer to do the most menial tasks once they see my pregnancy showing. Again, grateful for the kindness, but deeply missing real friendships. I didn't have many friends in New York, but Frankie, my parents, hell, even Pattie all had their roles in my life.

Meeting Valentino, I could have easily made friends with his sister. That's where our relationship was heading before I left him that letter. I worry about him, think about him, wonder how he's doing. Every time I pick up the phone to call him or text, I put it down.

Now, with the eight months that have gone by, it seems ridiculous to just call him out of the blue for casual chitchat. What would I say to him?

"Sorry I split, oh and by the way, I'm having your baby. Sorry I didn't tell you, but I was scared the mob boss who tried to have me kidnapped would find out I wasn't really dead. Now Caputo can try to kill me and your baby. So how's things?" The words sound just as ridiculous out loud as they do in my head.

The fluttering motion of a jab from the inside of my body reminds me that I'm not alone. I take several deep breaths, rubbing my stomach to ease our little baby girl's frantic movements. She doesn't care. I imagine I'd be fed up too if someone tried keeping me in a space the size of a mailbox.

I'm barely to the thirty-four-week mark in my pregnancy when my phone rings, a video chat from the only person in the world who knows I'm alive and pregnant with Don Valentino Barrone's baby.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Frankie's excitement is contagious. "Guess where I am?"

He pans the phone around and at first I have no idea until I spot the infamous potholders and matching olive oil canisters.

"When did you get back?" I ask him.

"A few weeks ago. It was such a pain in the ass trying to get Jake to get the fuck out of here. I almost had to take him to court. But when I told him that my cousin is married to the mob, he didn't even blink. He moved out in the middle of the night."

"Wow, married to the mob?"

"Sorry, love, you gotta use what you got. And you're all I've got. I need you to come back home."

"I am home," I tell him, waving to the humid living room around me.

"No, you know what I mean. Come back to the city. No one's even talking about Mafia stuff and that icky feeling of having someone follow me around is gone. I really think they've all forgotten about you. The news cycle is literally fifteen minutes. Besides, aren't you ready to pop that baby out? Come home. Stay with me. I'll do the room up real nice for you and the baby. You can get a bunch of those single-parent benefits and help me with bills and whatnot until I get back to lead dancer at Zollo's."

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