Page 62 of Savage Games

Maybe I could get ahold of Jane. Maybe she would help me? No. I didn’t trust Jane not to tell the media, or worse… Richard.

Scotland! I could hide out in Scotland.

It was just a cheap train ride away and I wouldn’t need any identification or passport. Maybe once I was there, I could secretly reach out to Richard and explain to him why I’d had to leave. I knew from snatches of overheard conversations that he was having a hard time tracking down whoever this crazy stalker woman was… maybe when she found out I had left him at the altar she would relax her guard and Richard could catch her.

After that I could come back… if Richard would have me.

If he could forgive me for once more running out on our relationship.

Or maybe, while I was away, he’d have time to think about me… about us. He’d have time to realize how horribly unsuited I was to be his duchess. How I was uncultured and immature compared to the women he had probably dated in the past. I didn’t have the poise or family connections everyone expected a bride of a high-ranking duke to have.

Toxic.

That was what I had called our relationship.

Toxic.

At the time I had meant he was toxic for me, but what if it was reversed? Maybe I was toxic for him? Hadn’t he said himself when we were on the train to Paris that I tortured him? That I was playing with his mind? That my constant need to have him pursue me for my own validation was driving him mad?

When you really thought about it, Richard brought everything to the relationship… what did I bring? Drama. I had done nothing but cause drama in his life since I had met him.

Looking down at the phone in my hand, I scrolled back to the photo of Richard with the text: Run… you don’t belong in his world.

Maybe that was the actual reason he always kept me isolated from the world and his friends and associates… was it possible Richard also thought deep down that I didn’t belong?

I loved him and he loved me, but from the very beginning there was no denying there was something dark and sinister about the love we shared. It was too extreme, too twisted, too obsessive. Toxic.

The events at his estate should have been enough of a warning bell to us both. We had gone too far down the rabbit hole… had gotten too caught up in the game. The drama of it. I had gotten so lost I had tried to kill him myself.

Once more I felt a reluctant, disgusting empathy for the woman stalking us both.

These violent delights have violent ends.

Clutching at my stomach, I fell to my knees as I felt the hysteria overwhelm me. Rocking back and forth, I bit my lip to keep from crying out. I didn’t know what to do. I was thinking in circles and making everything worse than it already was in my mind.

Once again, I clawed at the tight bodice of my dress. I couldn’t breathe. I needed air. I had to get out of here. Awkwardly rising to my feet, I stumbled toward the back entrance to the antechamber. As I reached out a shaking hand for the doorknob, I remembered the guards. I had forgotten about the guards! I would just have to plead wedding jitters to them and beg for a moment alone in the fresh air.

Throwing open the door, it shocked me to see that the very guards I had been worried about were gone.

My head swung left, then right. The hallway was empty.

Something was wrong. The guards should have been here. Something was very wrong.

Oh, God, I couldn’t breathe. My fingers gripped at the edge of my wedding dress bodice, pulling on it. I looked down at the mobile still clutched in my other hand.

He doesn’t love you.

You don’t deserve him.

He’s mine.

I couldn’t breathe.

You left him once. You’ll leave him again.

Run… you don’t belong in his world.

I felt sick.

---