Page 24 of One Hot Summer

“Come on,” he laughed, “it won’t be that bad. It’s only family. If someone starts asking you probing questions just shove some food in your mouth so you can’t answer.”

That was a very good point. This was a barbeque. Better yet, a barbeque hosted by my brother and his wife. Their ‘no processed meats’ rule meant there would be big, meaty beef burgers, pork sausages and strips of chicken coated in delicious marinades. Colourful salads and creamy pastas. My stomach grumbled at the thought of it all. I was so glad I’d skipped breakfast for this, as there would be a mountain of food on offer.

We got out of the car and Zack stared at the house. To be honest, it was more like a mansion. Surely no one needed that many bedrooms.

“This is quite a place,” he said, taking it all in. “Makes my flat look like a shed or an outbuilding.”

“I have to admit, it is really nice. Just don’t ask Liz about it. She’ll take you on a tour to show it all off, and that’ll take about three hours. You’ll miss all the food.”

“You could save me a burger.” He put his arm around my shoulders.

“If you want to risk leaving food alone with me, then it’ll be your own fault.”

He laughed and kissed the side of my head. The gravel crunched under our feet as we approached my mother in the doorway. She changed her expression from a scowl to a smile as she greeted Zack with a hug and a kiss on each cheek. She reserved this kind of affection for Zack every time she saw him.

“So nice to see you again, Zack.” She turned to me, looking less friendly. “You’re late.”

She stepped back so we could make our way into the house. The entrance hall was the same size as my living room. There was a bespoke oak wardrobe for coats, a matching cabinet for shoes, a two-seater sofa, and even a piano in the corner. I often liked to sit in entrance halls and listen to music. Who needed a lounge?

“Nice to see you too, Mother. Were you really waiting for us at the door?”

My tummy rumbled. I could smell food cooking.

“I heard you coming down the drive. The food is almost ready, so you’re just in time.”

“Oh good, I’m starving. Seriously, Zack, my brother gets the best burgers. You’ll love them.” My mouth was already watering.

“Actually, there’s something I forgot to mention,” my mother said, shutting the door behind us and dropping the latch to prevent any potential exit.

“What? Don’t tell me they didn’t get any burgers?” I complained, already wishing I was out the door.

“Not quite.” She wouldn’t look me in the eye. “There are burgers, but not what one, or rather you, would usually have.”

“Mum, what is going on?”

“They’re, ah… Your brother and Elizabeth now eat a more plant-based diet.”

“What the chuff is a plant-based diet? Are they cooking dandelions?” Although, come to think of it, a garden weed would be far too common. They would be ordering bouquets of only the best flowers from the florist to eat instead.

“They’re… exploring a vegan lifestyle,” she finally said.

An unplanned explosion of laughter left my mouth, only ending when I saw that this wasn’t a joke. My mother was being serious.

“They’re what?”

My brother. The one who lived on meat-feast pizzas throughout his three years at university. The one who ordered double-meat subs from Subway. The one who wanted a spit-roast pig at his twenty-first birthday party. He had given up all animal products? This had to be a wind-up.

“They’ve decided on a change to be healthier and more eco-friendly, so this whole barbeque has a vegan-only selection of food. It’s actually rather delicious. Marvellous what these chefs come up with nowadays, you can’t tell the difference. You should sample the bacon or should I say facon. Tremendous.”

“So, they’re going to save the planet by forcing everyone to eat lettuce and hummus? What if there’s a greenfly on the lettuce and I accidentally eat it, will Liz ban me from the house?”

Zack scratched his chin in order to hide his smile.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Jennifer, it won’t kill you to try something new.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I could have prepared by eating something before I came.

“Because I know you, and you wouldn’t have come at all. You would have found an excuse, something to do with that cat of yours.”

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