Page 1 of Forbid Me
Chapter One
CHARLOTTE
“Fuck yeah, just like that, baby,” Ryder says as he fucks me from behind. I make all the right noises, look as if I’m having a whale of a time, but really, I’m just going through the motions, processing what I found out only a few hours ago.
That Ryder has been cheating on me. For months. Close to six, to be exact. And not just with anyone, but with his best mate’s girlfriend, Melanie. It doesn’t get much shittier than that.
I don’t even know why I allowed us to fuck in the first place, it’s like my mind has gone on strike and I don’t know what to say or do, so letting him stick his dick in me one last time seemed the easier option than delving into what will be an argument about what I’ve discovered. The thing is, I’ve been with Ryder for the last two years, and for most of that, he’s belittled me, made me feel like only he could ever love me or want me, but it’s only just now that I’m seeing him for what he truly is. A fucking narcissistic asshole. He’s been clever about it, that’s for sure, blindsiding me, drawing me in, only to rip my heart to shreds.
He releases moments later, pulling out and ripping the condom off, chucking it in the bin by his bed before he flops down beside me and lets out a contended sigh. Wish I could say I felt as content as he does right now, but I’m far from it. My nerves are frayed, the worry growing rapidly in my chest as I try and figure out what I’m going to do and how I’m going to break away from him when, even now, he’s had such a strong hold over me since day one.
I feel stupid as I lie there, and it’s only when he falls asleep that I allow a few tears to fall.
I’m sat in the cafeteria a few days later, trying to eat my lunch, but the thoughts of Melanie and Ryder together keep plaguing my mind. It doesn’t help that they’re currently sat across from me, talking away, leaving me totally out of the conversation. I mean, I’m happy to be left out of it, but it’s making me question how the hell I didn’t see anything before. The slight touches, the cheeky smiles, the sly wink when Ryder thinks no one is looking. Makes me feel sick.
I hooked up with Ryder when I was sixteen—him too. We’ve known each other since primary school, so for him to shit on me like this is so disrespectful. But then, he’s never respected me. I know that now. And yet, I still haven’t broke it off with him. Truth is, I’m worried about the impact it will have on the remainder of my time at high school. There are only a couple of months left, so do I just hang it out and then break it off when I go to college? Or do I simply bite the bullet and put up with whatever shit will come my way when the deed is done? I’ve got a fucking headache just thinking about it.
“Oh, hey, baby,” Melanie purrs as Travis, her boyfriend and Ryder’s best friend, walks up to the table and bends down to place a kiss on her lips. She acts the part well as she chuckles and bats him away, but if you look closely, you can see that she would rather he wasn’t here—me too, for that matter. Fucking bitch.
“Hey, cutie,” Suzie, my best friend, says as she slides in the seat beside me, nicking a chip off my plate. I smile at her and push my plate towards her, my appetite non-existent.
“Hey, Suzie,” Ryder says from across the table.
“Dickhead,” Suzie greets him, and I stifle a chuckle. She’s aware of what I know and has promised to keep it to herself, but she’s also always hated Ryder with a passion. I guess she could see what I couldn’t.
“Do you always have to be so fucking rude?” Ryder says, his cheeks a little flushed with embarrassment. He hates it when he’s shown up in front of people, and Suzie has never shied away from calling him whatever she wants. I used to try and smooth things over between them, exhausted from the constant battle between my best friend and my boyfriend, but not anymore. Ryder moves his light green eyes to mine, imploring me to say something, anything, but I simply shrug my shoulders and take a sip of my drink. He’s about to say something when Travis asks him a question, and I silently thank Travis for his interruption. It isn’t until he’s finished speaking with Ryder that he briefly looks at me and gives me a wink. I startle, unsure if I actually saw that or if my mind is playing tricks on me. But it’s quite clear it was no trick when Travis stands up and says goodbye, waiting until everyone is looking away from him before nodding his head to the side and raising his eyebrows, as if he’s speaking in some sort of code for me to follow him.
I look around the table, seeing Suzie on her phone and Ryder and Melanie deep in conversation once again, none of them taking any notice of the short, brief interaction between me and Travis—although, it was barely an interaction at all. I scan the room for him, to see him stood by the cafeteria entrance looking at me, his head doing that nodding thing again before he disappears outside.
“I… uh… need to go and hand some homework in that I forgot,” I announce awkwardly, garnering a fake smile from Melanie and a quick “Catch you later” from Ryder before they only seem to have eyes for one another again. However, Suzie looks up from her phone with a quizzical look on her face. I pull my phone out of my pocket and mouth, ‘Text you later’, before I turn and follow the same path that Travis did, wondering why he’s being so secretive.
Chapter Two
CHARLOTTE
I walk outside the cafeteria, following along the side of the building, looking for any sign of Travis, when I’m abruptly pulled by my arm into an alcove that leads to the teachers’ staff room. Before I have time to process, my eyes lock with Travis’ as his hand links with mine and he pulls me along behind him and into the cleaners’ closet just past the staff room. The teachers are all occupied with eating their lunch and, probably, moaning about the students that have pissed them off today to bother noticing me and Trav.
When the door closes, we’re encased in darkness, save for the partial light coming in from the window on the back wall. I say partial because the window backs onto a wall, shadowing it.
“What the hell, Trav?” I ask quietly, noticing our hands are still linked together but doing nothing to pull away—and neither is he.
“You know, don’t you?” he asks, his light blue eyes staring down into mine. Travis is taller than me by about a foot, and he’s always joked around that I’m pint-sized, something I’ve always found endearing. Whereas Ryder has always insisted I wear high heels to make myself taller. There’s a massive difference right there. My boyfriend tries to change me, and Travis just accepts me for who I am. Huh. I’ve never really given that much thought before now, preferring to block out that I don’t feel good enough for Ryder.
“Know what?” I ask.
“About Melanie and Ryder.”
“Oh my god, you know too?” I ask him, my eyes wide as he nods his head. “How long?”
“I found out two days ago. You?”
“Last week,” I reply shamefully, my head dipping down.
“Hey,” Travis says as his free hand comes to my chin and lifts my head up so I’m looking at him again. “You don’t need to look away from me, Char. I’m not Ryder.”
And fucking hell, those words alone have tears springing to my eyes. “God, I’ve been so fucking stupid,” I rasp out, desperately trying to hold back the tears.
“We both have,” Travis says, taking part of my burden and making it his own with his admission.
