Page 58 of Losing Control
“I don’t need help.”
“Does he hurt you?” Kim asks completely knocking me sideways.
“What?” I say, whispering.
“Does he hurt you, Lucy?” Kim’s expression is grim, and I am sure that mine is masked in horror. I look down at the table, desperately trying not to give anything away.
I can’t tell her.
It’s my problem, not hers.
I suddenly wish that I wasn’t here having this drink, my joy at having a little freedom evaporating. If I had just gone straight home, then I wouldn’t have been subjected to this line of questioning. I also wouldn’t have the lurking thought of what Michael is going to do when I walk through the front door.
“Lucy,” Kim says as she places her hand over mine. I look up at her and a lone tear slides down my cheek. “Does he physically hurt you?” Kim has the decency to talk quietly. I feel caged, as if I am being cornered.
This is my chance.
I can do this. I can tell her.
I can find my voice.
I open my mouth, ready to spill my secrets to her, when I hear him.
“Lucy,” Michael says from the side of our table. I whip my head around and take in his form standing there, looking down at me. I feel any colour that I had left drain from my face.
I can’t speak.
Why is he here?
Did he hear what Kim said?
Did he sense that I was about to break?
Did he come here to make it clear that I can never escape?
“Hey,” I say as I hastily swipe my cheek, wiping away the wet trail left by my tear. “What are you doing here?” I put on a fake, cheerful voice and force a smile onto my face.
“I just came out to pick us up some food and thought I would drop in and see what you fancied,” he says, his eyes intently searching mine.
“Oh.”
“Are you okay?” he asks, his expression conveying sympathy. I just nod at him in reply. I can feel Kim watching us both as she sits quietly on the opposite side. The air around us is so tense that there is no way that it can go unnoticed.
Michael’s jaw tenses and I know that he doesn’t believe me. He’s wary.
“Um, actually, I don’t feel too good,” I say, hoping that this will suffice his over active imagination.
“No?” He places his hand on the back of my head and I have to stop myself from flinching at his touch.
“My stomachs hurting.”
“Maybe you should come home with me?” Michael suggests, and I can see Kim shake her head slightly in my peripheral vision.
“I think that’s a good idea.” I haven’t even drunk any of my wine, but that’s the least of my worries. “I’m sorry, Kim,” I say, needing her to let me walk out of here without her asking questions. “I need to go.”
“Sure,” she replies, shocking the hell out of me with the one-word answer. I can see the disappointment in her eyes though, she doesn’t need to tell me.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?” I say as I shuffle off of the seat and into Michael’s outstretched arm. As I step close to his body he curls his arm around me, placing his palm on my shoulder, squeezing slightly. I gulp down the lump that has formed in my throat.
