Page 23 of Losing Control
“Michael, can you just let go of my arm?” The pain is intensifying, and I am pretty sure that his grip has tightened even more.
“You told me that he meant nothing to you. Did you lie?”
“What?”
“Did you lie about how you feel about him?”
“No, of course not,” I reply, flabbergasted at his reaction.
“Then why the fuck is he sat by you?”
“Because Kim told him that he could sit with us.”
“Don’t blame Kim. He was sat by you.”
“So?” I fail to see where he is going with this.
“So? Is that all you have to say?” His tone is firm, not wavering one little bit.
“What do you want me to say?” Panic starts to rise within me. I’ve never seen Michael this angry before. I don’t know how to deal with it.
“I want you to tell me that you’re not a liar, Lucy. I want you to realise how much I fucking love you, and how much another man sitting next to you pisses me off.”
“I haven’t lied,” I answer quietly.
“Are you sure about that?”
“Yes, Michael, for fuck’s sake. Kim said he could sit down, and he just sat. That’s it, there is nothing more to it than that. You guys came back over thirty seconds later. Now, will you please let go of my arm?” I can see the emotional war that he is battling on the inside and it breaks my heart. “I love you, Michael, nothing is going to change that.”
I watch as his face softens, and he seems to finally register his hand gripping my arm.
“Shit,” he says as he lets me go. I let out a little cry of relief as my arm drops to my side, a dull throb pulsing through it. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry, Lucy. I just… You being around other guys makes me crazy. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I would never––”
“Shhh,” I say as I place a finger over his lips. “I know.”
I can feel Michael trembling as I push my body against his and wrap my arms around his waist. His arms envelope me fiercely. He whispers that he is sorry over and over again.
I know that he didn’t mean it.
He loves me, and love can make us do silly things.
Chapter Seventeen
Work woes
I have now been in my current management job for three months. Things have been going well, until today. Today has been awful and I have no idea how I am going to make the situation better.
It was all going well, until Mr Collinson announced that I had to work with Tyler on a certain project. Michael overheard, and my world has currently dimmed a little.
Tyler is ecstatic that he gets to work on this new idea. I smiled and told him that it would be a great opportunity, all the while wondering how I was going to get out of it. I went and spoke to Mr Collinson, but he wouldn’t hear of me handing the project to anyone else, and Tyler shows the most promise on my team, so the decision is final.
Michael didn’t wait for me to walk home with him. Not a good sign.
I say goodbye to Kim and make my way out of the building. Once I step foot outside, my brave face slips and I let the inner turmoil overtake me. Each step towards my home with Michael fills me with dread. This is just going to fuel Michael’s insecurities. We got over the scenario in the pub the other day, but this is going to be ten times worse.
I walk as slowly as I can, but I reach the door of our flat far too quickly. With a heavy heart, I make my way up to door thirteen.
Putting my key in the lock, I turn it and open the door slightly. There is no sound.
