Page 19 of Losing Control
“Probably because Jeremy was drunk.”
Jeremy is one of those guys that doesn’t have a bad bone in his body when he is drunk. He will talk to anyone and is generally just up for a laugh.
“I don’t like it, Luce. I don’t like Tom being able to reach your friends. The guy is an asshole, and he hurt you.” His tone is dangerous as he speaks, but I just put this down to him not liking my ex.
“There’s no need to worry, Tom is irrelevant to my life.”
“I still don’t like it.” His grip on me tightens more, his fingers digging into my skin a little too much, but I don’t say anything, I’m more concerned with knocking this insecurity out of him. I stop walking and turn to face him. I place my hands on either side of his face and stare straight into his eyes.
“I am not interested in Tom,” I start, saying each word slowly. “The only man that I care about is stood right in front of me. I don’t care if Jeremy chats to him because there is nothing that Tom can say that will affect me. He’s part of my past, but you are my future.”
“Do you mean that?”
“Of course I do.”
“I don’t ever want you to leave me,” he says with a new-found urgency in his tone.
“I’m not going to leave you.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
“You’re mine and no one else’s.”
“Yes, Michael, I’m yours.”
Chapter Fourteen
Commitment
“Move in with me,” Michael says as we lay in bed together, our limbs entwined. I shoot up to a sitting position and swivel my body around so that I can look at him.
“What?” I whisper, astounded by his question.
“Move in with me.” It’s not a question, more of a statement.
“Are you serious?” I ask. We have only been together for five months, so it seems a little rushed.
“I have never been more serious about anything before.” He sits up and cups my face in his hands. “I love you and I want to wake up to you every morning. I don’t want to be apart from you.”
“But, we haven’t been together for that long, what happens if it doesn’t work out?” My insecurities rear their head. I moved in with Tom and it all went to shit. I don’t want that to happen with Michael.
“Why wouldn’t it work out?”
“I don’t know. Life throws unexpected shit at you,” I say with a shrug of my shoulders.
“It does, but I think that we’re stronger together. Aren’t you sick of staying at Kim’s? Don’t you want to have a place that you can call your own?”
“Well, yeah, eventually––”
“Then why not now?” He looks so hopeful and I don’t want my worries to wipe the hope off of his face.
“I just… What we have is great and I love being with you. I don’t want anything to change.”
“It won’t change. It will be better. Don’t you want to try it?”
“You’ve given this a lot of thought, haven’t you?” I ask him, seeing it written across his face.
