Page 59 of These Wicked Desires

“Did Martha Stewart abduct you and sew herself into your skin?” I look around the room with a wide grin and bat at the sheer curtains Cade hung around the bed to fall in billowing waves to the ground. The dresser has been moved to the foot of the bed, so the curtains will completely surround it and the bed, encasing us in the white material. A veritable love nest.

“Ew, Kai. That’s gross.” He shudders dramatically then continues hanging the twinkling lights along the ceiling. “I want Ellis to be able to forget about tomorrow, and give her something to remember … just in case.”

My stomach sinks at his words. It’s like a roller coaster. One second I’m fine, distracted by something and not thinking of tomorrow. Then the next, I’m plunging down the hill, stomach in my throat, about to vomit. All it takes is one word. One reminder of what’s to come.

It’s not just Ellis I’m worried about. It’s not just the little family I have in these three. It’s Cade too. My … lover? That sounds weird to me, but he is. He’s more than my best friend. He’s the other half of my heart, the half he somehow managed to pry away from Ellis. This could be the last time we have a moment together.

I snag his waist and spin him around. He gasps in surprise and I take the opening to claim his mouth. The twinkling lights hit the floor and Cade threads his fingers into my hair, pressing his body tight to mine. There was a time we never would have done this. When everything physical between us was to help me get out of my own head. But now it's a conscious choice. To kiss the man I love, to let him know exactly how I feel.

It started hard and fast, dominance and claiming. But it doesn’t stay like that. Quickly, the kiss slows. Deepens. Becomes more. My heart feels heavy in my chest, and I try not to think about how this could be the last time I hold Cade in my arms. His cedar and lilac scent surrounds me. His warmth against my chilled skin. The way he seems to fit perfectly against me. I commit it all to memory.

When we finally break apart, I stare into his violet eyes, so full of tenderness and fear. That stupid lock of brown hair that I love has fallen forward across his brow, and I reach up to brush it back, letting my fingers trail through his hair.

“I love you, Kai,” he says, a touch breathless.

My heart squeezes painfully, and I swallow down the despair that suddenly drowns me. I give him one last lingering kiss, tasting his lips, breathing in his breath. “I love you too, Cade.”

We cling to each other for another few minutes, then Cade pulls away. “Help me get the room ready?”

When Ellis enters a few minutes later, helping Sterling carry trays of various snacks and drinks, she gasps. Her amber eyes glitter in the soft white lights Cade hung from the ceiling and along the walls. I hung blankets over the windows to ensure no sunlight could peek through and dim their brilliance. She smiles when her gaze lands on the bed, the gauzy fabric hanging around it and the piles of blankets and pillows atop it.

“You guys,” she breathes, her eyes shining brighter as tears glisten on her lashes.

I pat the spot on the bed next to me and smile. “Hop in.”

Cade grabs the tray from her and she climbs into the bed next to me, snuggling against my side and pulling a blanket over her legs. “I can’t believe you guys did this for me.”

“It’s what you wanted,” Sterling says, setting his tray at the foot of the bed before laying on Ellis’s other side. “And we wanted to make it as special as possible.”

“Besides,” Cade adds, his tray joining Sterling’s. “It’s not like we don’t benefit from these cuddle sessions. We enjoy them as much as you do.” He tries to sit on my other side, but I tug him between my legs, so his back is against my chest. This way he’ll be next to Ellis as well.

Sterling turns on the movie, some new comedy that none of us pay attention to. Instead, we talk, laugh, dream. We make plans for our future and discuss the changes we want to make to the cabin. Ellis quietly mentions adding a nursery, and the surge of emotions from Sterling and Cade slips through my shields. Hope. Happiness. Fear.

It’s too much right now, and as pressure builds in my chest, I blurt out the first thing I can to diffuse the tension. “Malakai Junior.”

“What?” Ellis asks, turning her head to look at me.

I smirk and rub my thumb along her bottom lip. “Our first kid. He’ll be named Malakai Junior.”

Cade snorts and Ellis raises one brow. But it’s Sterling who brings me back down to earth, as always. “What if it’s a girl?”

“Uh … Malakina?” I say slowly as the name forms in my mind.

“Yeah, that’s not happening,” Ellis says, shaking her head.

“Besides, Sterling Junior sounds better.” Sterling crosses his arms without looking away from the movie.

All of us gape at him, and Ellis is the first to burst out in laughter. He’s always so serious, so hearing the joke from him while he keeps his gaze glued to the TV and his mouth pressed in a firm line, causes all of us to laugh. Ellis laughs so hard she snorts, and the sound causes Sterling’s lips to quirk in a smile.

“There will be no Juniors,” Ellis says breathily after we all get ourselves back under control. “That wouldn’t be fair.”

“Not to mention confusing,” Cade mutters. “Two of each of us?”

Ellis shudders dramatically. “I can’t handle that. I can barely handle you three alone.”

“I doubt you have to worry about that,” I say, brushing a curl behind her ear. “I’m sure all of our kids will take after you. Beautiful, sweet, and caring.”

“Stubborn, headstrong, and opinionated.” Sterling’s words are quiet but we all hear them.

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