Page 35 of These Deadly Dreams

I clear my throat and close the door behind me. Violet and gray eyes zero in on me.

“Are you okay, Sterling?” Cade asks.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I reply.

Cade’s eyes narrow. “I feel like everything has gotten all messed up lately. I don’t like it.”

His fingers trail over Ellis’s forearm absentmindedly, like he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it. That casual, habitual gesture sends a pang of sadness through me. Will I ever have that with her?

“Yeah, well.” I shrug, unsure what to say. How do I tell them what they probably already know? I’m jealous, angry, and incredibly sad. I don’t want to risk further damaging our friendship, especially because all of this is my fault.

“Everything is going to work out,” Cade says quietly, seeing right through me.

Kai may be the empath, but Cade can read people better than anyone I’ve met. His caring and understanding nature are usually things I like about him. Right now, though, it just pisses me off even more.

I grab a shirt hanging on the back of a kitchen chair and tug it on. “It’s almost time to leave. Wake Ellis up.” I don’t mean my words to sound as harsh as they do, but I’m teetering on the edge, and I need to keep myself from falling over. Too much is at stake to let myself fall apart.

Kai gently shakes her shoulder and whispers something in her ear, while Cade stands and stretches.

“We’re coming with you. At least to the house. We’ll remain hidden while you go inside, but we figure it’s safer if you have someone keeping watch.”

I jerk my head once in agreement and walk out the front door. I don’t think I can handle watching them get ready together, making eyes at each other, smirking and laughing. I’d probably crack.

I hop in Kai’s Charger and wait, forcing the negative thoughts from my mind. No one likes self-deprecation, and it won’t do anything to help me get back in Ellis’s good graces. I watch as the three of them descend the front steps. Ellis walks around the front of the car and opens the passenger door. She slides into the front seat and gives me a small smile, and I hate the flutter of hope that builds in my chest.

“Alright,” Kai says as he shuts the door behind him. “Let’s do this. Carefully! Don’t hurt my car, please.”

I ease the car down the rocky terrain with Kai groaning dramatically everytime I hit a particularly big bump. He heaves a sigh of relief as I pull onto the road and head toward town.

“I’ve never been on pack land before,” Ellis says.

“It’s nice,” I reply. “We have everything we’d need in town so we don’t have to go to the city. It’s easy to keep a low profile, if that’s what you want. Although, lately it’s been going downhill. A lot of buildings are run down now, and everything could use a good sprucing.”

“Noah has really made a mess of the lands and the pack,” Cade says from the backseat. “It’s a shame. The wolves used to be a powerhouse, but now they’re more like corrupt criminals.”

“Would you become alpha if you could?” Ellis’s question is quiet and tentative, as if she’s scared to ask.

“I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “I’ve thought a lot about it, but it would depend on a lot of things.” I glance at her, my meaning clear. It would depend on her accepting our mating bond. There is no way I could challenge Noah and keep my family safe without the extra strength our bond would give me.

She looks down at her hands in her lap, her curls falling forward to hide her expression from me. I wish I had Kai’s abilities, to know what she was feeling right now. I tighten my grip on the steering wheel and pull the car off the road and behind an ivy covered wall that used to be part of a mechanics shop on the outskirts of town. It has long since crumbled to the ground under Noah’s rule.

“We go on foot from here,” I say as I cut the engine.

A crow caws from the top of the wall as we climb out of the car, and I give Drew a wave. He flies off over the sparse forest the wolves frequently run in. We’re lucky it’s a new moon tonight. The phases of the moon don’t have any impact on shifters like it does in the stories. But we do have a special relationship with it, and many of the shifters worship Luna, the goddess of the moon. As such, wolves mostly run during a full moon.

We follow Drew through the forest as he keeps an eye on the surrounding area for any wolves. The darkness is complete in the woods. There are no city lights to cast a harsh glow over the trees, and no moon to provide overhead light. Ellis stumbles, and I reach out to steady her. I forget she doesn’t have any supernatural abilities, at least not like Kai and I do. Cade will be using his magic to enhance his eyesight, but Ellis is essentially human right now.

Without thinking, I grasp her hand in mine and help lead her over the fallen branches and protruding rocks. She doesn’t pull away, and again that flutter of hope grows in my chest.

When we come to the edge of the forest, we stop. This will be the riskiest part of this entire plan. Noah’s house is situated next to the forest, but a wide expanse of flat grass lies between them. There is no cover for us to hide behind as we cross it. I wait for Drew to signal that everything is clear, and Ellis and I sprint across the clearing, leaving Kai and Cade to keep watch from the woods.

I pause briefly at the top of the back steps, my hand hovering over the doorknob. My heart is pounding in my chest, and not from the run. This is it. This is the moment I have been waiting for for almost 150 years.

Ellis squeezes my hand. “You can do this. You’re not alone.”

I glance down into my mate's amber eyes and take a deep breath. Her presence here makes all the difference. Even with our history, I can feel her support and encouragement, and it gives me the strength I need to turn the knob. I step through the door, and almost fall to my knees.

She’s there, standing in the kitchen, shaking hands covering her mouth, and tears gleaming in her bright blue eyes. She’s aged since I saw her last. Fine lines crease around her eyes, and streaks of gray adorn her raven black hair. But she is still as beautiful as ever.

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