Page 70 of Steamy Ever After

“Is that a bad thing?” I ask, following her inside.

“Normally, no. But today, yes.”

She leaves the door wide open. I guess she doesn’t trust me even a little.

“So, this is the place.” She disappears into the small kitchen and settles her groceries on the counter, then returns. “I’ll show you around.”

Original pine wood floors run through the apartment, intricately detailed moldings frame every room and the unobstructed view of the park across the street is outstanding. She points to every piece of furniture, telling me which ones she’s willing to share and which ones are strictly off-limits.

“This cost me a fortune,” she says, pointing to the extra-large red couch. “You can sit in it, but any damage will mean automatic eviction. Got it?”

“Got it.” I nod and notice the way her eyes linger on my lips for a few seconds.

She clears her throat. “Still interested?”

“Sure, it’ll do.”

“Great,” she deadpans, then reaches into a desk drawer and pulls out a small stack of paperwork. “Here’s the lease.” She places it on the coffee table along with a pen. “And this is just a little something extra.”

I sit and read the lease, signing where I’m supposed to, then look over the double-sided ‘something extra’ and frown.

“Are these your… rules?”

She crosses her arms tightly. “Not rules. Just the way I like things.”

Focused on checking my signatures on the lease, she doesn’t see my eye roll, but I take a breath and remind myself the rent is half what I pay for my current shit-hole. There is no way I can turn this place down, even if Jane seems a bit insane.

“Welcome, Joseph.” She hands me the keys and I laugh at the Fuck The PatriarKey keychain that comes with them.

“Thanks, roomie,” I say, feeling a strange mix of irritation and amusement. I reach a hand out. “And you can call me Joe, by the way.”

She purses her lips, but doesn’t shake my hand. “We’ll see.”

The feeling that living with Jane is going to be a rollercoaster ride settles on my shoulders when I leave, and she shuts the door behind me.

But hey, at least living with her won’t be boring.

CHAPTER 2

JOE

“That’s not how you tape a box.”

Will rips the tape gun out of my hands.

“You’re the expert mover,” I reply, amused, and take a step back. “Show me how it’s done, oh wise one.”

He folds and flips the cardboard box over, dropping it to the ground, then places the gun on one edge, pressing down a bit of packing tape. “See, like this. You push this down as you pull.”

I fight the urge to laugh, pressing my lips together.

The gun makes a loud, ccckcck sound that echoes through what will soon be my former living room. He cuts the end off with the gun’s jagged teeth and runs his hand across the taped bottom of the box, grinning, pleased with his work.

“See? Perfection.”

“Honestly, it’s unbelievable you’re still single,” I reply. The gun flies toward me, hitting me squarely in the chest, but I laugh it off.

Will sits on the couch, crossing one leg over the other. “What did you think of Jane?”