Page 140 of The Thought of You

Addie and I haven’t had any moment alone at school this week. I’ve barely seen her at all, since she’s been busy organizing her classroom. She’s never in the teachers’ lounge when I’m in there, and her car always sits empty in the parking lot at the end of each day.

School wouldn’t have been the most appropriate place to air out our issues, anyway, but at least I could’ve told her how much I fucking miss her.

It didn’t help that my family stared at me during the entirety of dinner last night like I’m a hopeless loser.

A knock on the door lifts my damn soul, and again, I spill my beer on my shorts as I tear it from my mouth mid-sip.

Swiping at it with the back of my hand is futile, but I still do it as I saunter toward the door and open it.

Little eyes blink back at me, and my chest warms as Whitney blazes inside, Huck on her hip.

“I need to pee.” She passes the baby over like a hot potato, slings the diaper bag against the wall, and races toward the bathroom.

“I’ll have to teach you better manners than your mom’s,” I say to the little man.

Bouncing him against my shoulder, I walk us to the couch, and he twists my shirt in his tiny fist. The sounds he makes are incoherent, but I can tell he can’t wait to talk.

“You’ll be speaking in full sentences before we know it,” I whisper. “All in good time. No need to rush. You’re young and carefree.”

What I want to tell him is to stay this little and innocent for as long as possible. It’s what I’ve thought with each pound he gains, because time is moving too quickly.

“What are you saying to him?” Whitney plops onto the couch next to us. “You better not be telling him anything about love, because that’s not your strong suit.”

“Never said it was,” I toss back. “Wait. Why are you jumping to love so quickly? I could’ve been telling him about the burrito I had for lunch. It was one of the best I’ve ever had.”

Whit studies me, her tongue in her cheek. “Plausible, but I’m sticking with love, especially after last night.”

“Nothing happened last night.”

“Exactly. You made no joke about Lottie’s orange highlights, which she did seriously and not ironically for Halloween. She looked like a prop at a haunted house.”

The idea of zombies at a haunted house reminds me of Addie’s date she’d told me about during our night in Savannah. Everything fucking reminds me of her.

“I was being supportive,” I argue, but my voice isn’t as strong as I’d like.

“Is that why you didn’t chime in when Dad let me win at Jenga? You hate it when he does that.”

“He does it so often, I figured it was time to let it go.” I give her a sarcastic, tight-lipped smile as Huck taps his fist to my cheek.

He and his mom are bringing on the punches, aren’t they?

“Why are you here?” I ask and immediately regret it as her face falls. “I didn’t mean to sound like I don’t want you here. It’s just that you never drop by unannounced.”

“Maybe I should do it more often.” She dips her head and fidgets with her fingers in her lap, her black sweater and scarf both extra thick like she’s preparing for an ice storm. “I’m sorry I haven’t been a very good sister to you.”

“What are you talking about? Whit, you’re an amazing sister.” I furrow my brows.

“I always ask so much of you, and you’re always there without complaint. I never return the favor.”

I squint over at her as she continues to fidget. She doesn’t meet my eye, and my skin crawls. “You talked to Mom. She told you everything I said, didn’t she?” I shake my head.

“Of course, she did.” Whit finally looks up at me. “We’re a family. We should all know what’s going on with one another, and actually—” She rises from her spot and smacks me in the back of the head, knocking my hat onto the floor.

“What the he—” I peer down at Huck, who stares at me with wide eyes. “I mean, what the heck was that?”

“You deserve it.” My sister drops back onto her ass and bends her knee onto the cushion. “I shouldn’t have had to hear that stuff from Mom. I wish you would’ve told me.”

“What did you want me to say?”

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