Page 134 of The Charm of You

A young barista slides our coffees toward us as the foamer wheezes next to him. He doesn’t flinch, but I do. I’m squirrely today, and it’s in no small part because I have to face Melissa. The outcome of this morning will determine my future—my immediate future, anyway.

I can do this.

“You’re strong.”

My heart cracks just a little more. It’s been aching ever since I left Austin and the whole town of Sapphire Creek.

But I’m here to take care of business.

I can freaking do this.

With my latte in one hand, I wave theatrically toward Blazer with the other and call out, “Give my love to Rufus and Baby!”

I punctuate my parting jab with a flip of my hair and strut out of the café with my head held high. I’m a good friend, and if Blazer can’t see it, then it’s his loss.

“You’re putting off some really chic vibes right now.” Beverly lengthens her strides in order to keep up with me.

“That’s a good thing, right?” I ask.

“Absolutely.” She smirks and takes a sip of her latte.

“Since when do you drink it with oat milk?”

“Last week, I was in the kitchen at the office, and Starla was ranting to Mindy about how much better oat milk is for you. It’s loaded with shit like riboflavin and vitamin B12. Who knew?”

“That might be true. But let’s not forget that Starla also eats seaweed, and she lobbied Melissa to grant her maternity leave because she got a new bird.” I side-eye her.

Bev shrugs. “The seaweed’s not so bad. Tastes like soy sauce.”

“You’ve changed.”

“That’s what happens when you leave for a whole week,” she shoots back. “A lot can change in that time.”

She’s right about that.

I keep my focus on the sidewalk in front of me. When I first moved here, I made the mistake of taking my eyes off the path for a split second, and I ended up running into a construction worker who practically shoved me into the street, where a taxi nearly clipped me.

Paying attention is life or death around here.

My pulse skyrockets as we blend into the morning workforce traffic. Most of us don leather gloves and cling to shiny briefcases. Many talk into their Bluetooth earpieces, wearing them like accessories as they might earrings or a watch. The skyscrapers seem enormous today, even with their top few stories hidden behind the fog, and the morning chill bites at my cheeks.

As we parade through the crosswalk at a brisk pace, the memory of casually strolling the downtown square in Sapphire Creek washes over me. I walked at my own leisure. I didn’t have to hurry to be anywhere. Even if I had a job there, I don’t imagine I’d need to rush every minute of every day.

I could stop and smell the roses. At the very least, I could have a pleasant conversation with my friends and start my mornings with a bang, instead of partaking in one-sided, empty small talk with the likes of Blazer.

I could drive around town without having to use the car horn or fight traffic at all. I’d return home, where I could cook a hot meal using my mother’s recipes. She could come over and eat whenever she was free.

The fantasy continues playing in my head to include a surly man entering the front door, his work boots glistening with splatters of motor oil. I’d scold him for the mess he’s trotting inside, and he’d grunt. He’d push back just to irritate me, and then he’d scoop me in his arms and plant a hot kiss on my mouth.

We’d get carried away, and?—

“Are you coming?”

I blink at Beverly, who’s propped the door open for me to enter. We’ve made it to the office building. I was so lost in my thoughts, and my mouth is now dry as the intimidating tower looms over me.

With one foot in front of the other, I saunter inside, thanking Beverly for holding the door, but my mind is still a jumbled mess. My thoughts are much like the contents of an “everything but the kitchen sink” casserole. I just need to figure out how the pieces fit together.

On the elevator, Beverly shimmies and claps. “I’m so glad you’re here. Feels good to be back, right?”

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