Page 1 of Embrace

Tears slid down my face as I curled into a fetal position and sobbed silently. The pain spread from my heart to my lungs, and down to my stomach. Everything hurt. Everything ached. My will to live was hanging on by a mustard seed of faith. His words haunted me.

“I can’t do this with you anymore, Suvi,” he expressed solemnly.

“What?” The punch to my heart made me short of breath. The inevitable break up crept around the corner, glaring at me with her evil smirk.

“We’re on a train to nowhere. I’m tired of putting my all into a relationship where I’m competing with another nigga for your heart.”

I blinked in confusion. “Huh? I’ve never cheated on you, Trey. I’ve always been faithful to you.”

“Sexually and physically, but emotionally… I can tell you’re not giving your all to me. I refuse to waste any more of my time chasing someone who would rather be with someone else.”

I bit down on my bottom lip to stop the tears from falling. No words left my mouth because I knew if I spoke, I’d unravel in front of him.

“Goodbye, Suvi.” He kissed my cheek and left my apartment.

When the door shut behind him, my dam burst, and the tears fell freely.

Six months with Trey went down the drain. Where did he get the idea of me not being present in our relationship emotionally? It had been this way with every relationship since I’d started dating back when I was a teenager. Men would approach me, flirt with me, and ultimately get a date. Things would go great for months and then out of the blue, they’d come with a similar script as Trey about me not being completely open in our relationship.

The urge to scream was strong.

The urge to throw things was even stronger.

Hell, I could use a fat blunt and a bottle of whiskey right about now.

As if on cue, the sound of the front door closing brought me out of my thoughts. There were a few moments of silence before my bedroom door pushed open and my best friend came into view.

His thick, bushy brows met in the center of his forehead. “What’s wrong?”

I sniffled and let out a whimper. “T-trey.”

“Did that nigga put his hands on you? I swear to God, I’ll end that nigga’s life right now.” Blaze growled with a brooding expression on his chocolate features.

Blaze Snow was my best friend since before either of us were born. Our mothers had a bond stronger than Hercules, and even though Blaze and I were two years apart, we were destined to be best friends.

“He didn’t physically hurt me, but he did just break my heart,” I explained as I wiped my face with the palms of my hands.

Blaze’s face staled. “What he do?”

“He said the same shit Gary and Malik said. I’m starting to think I’m the problem,” I confessed.

Blaze shook his head. “Naw. You’re the prize, Su. These niggas fumbling the bag.”

“Then why do I feel so low? Why don’t any of the men I attract see a real future with me?” I quizzed. Another wave of sobs escaped my lips as my eyes burned from the salty tears.

Why was I always broken hearted and alone? Why couldn’t my soulmate come get me out the trenches?

Blaze opened his arms. “C’mere, crybaby.”

With a few swift motions, I was out of the bed and standing in his warm embrace. His scent was comforting. The woodsy with a hint of spice scent filled my nostrils as his body heat wrapped around me like a blanket. Blaze stood over half a foot taller than me and towered over me like a giant. His beard brushed against my forehead while I welcomed the gentle hug.

“I’m going to be twenty-five in a few days, and I feel like I’m wasting my time,” I admitted once I’d taken a step back.

“I don’t know why you want to rush falling in love.”

“I’m not rushing, but after breakup number four in the span of two years… I feel like the path I’m currently on is destined to fail.”

“Trials and tribulations,” he replied.