Page 117 of Tickled Pink

“No,” I answer. “Not really.”

“What happened?”

“Well, your mom just offered me a blank check to leave you.”

“What?” Max stands up off the bed. “What did she say?”

I try to remember, but the moment is still a blur. “She said something about how your dad failed to bring you home, so she has to do it herself. Told me I don’t meet the standard for Monahan women and to name my price to leave and promise to never see you again.”

“That bitch,” Thad says.

“Oh, it gets better,” I say, looking at Thad. “Just as I was standing there holding back tears, your dad walked up and defended me.”

“My dad is here?!”

I turn back to Max, the memory crystal clear now. “He then called your mom a buck-toothed cocktail waitress to her face.”

My boys linger in place, stunned with sagging mouths.

“So, are we bailing now?” I ask. “I would very much like to bail now.”

“We’re bailing now,” Thad says as he hops off the bed. “Max?”

Max nods. “We’re bailing.”

“Yeah!” Thad walks to the window and unlocks it. “Fuck this house.”

I blink. “Oh, I thought we were gonna walk out the front door, but I guess the window works, too?”

Thad sticks a leg out. “Gotta watch for thorns, but it’s our preferred method of bailing during one of Keith and Donna’s lame parties.” He pauses with a hum.

“What?” Max asks.

“All the times I snuck through this window in high school and we never made out? Missed opportunities.”

Max playfully shoves his shoulder. “Just go.”

“Oh, speaking of high school,” Thad says, lingering on the window sill. “David Larkin knocked up Sally Sweet.”

“He did?!” Max and I say in unison.

“Their wedding is in August. I told David we were busy that weekend, but I wished them the best of luck.”

“Well…” I snort. “I can’t think of two people more made for each other. Poor kid, though.”

“I thought the same thing, Pinky.” Thad shimmies out and down the lattice, a smile etched onto his face. "The same damn thing,” he says, laughing the entire way down to the lawn.

I grin at Max. “What did I miss up here?” I ask.

Max blushes. “Just…” He clears his throat. “Receiving my birthday present.”

I gasp. “Without me?”

“It was in the moment.”

I lean in, offering him a kiss on the cheek. “Well, you guys will just have to do it again after dinner.”

“What’s for dinner?”

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