Page 98 of Bound By Hate (Born in Blood)

But I’m not a ballet dancer anymore, am I?

“I didn’t know,” I say after a moment. “That must be rough.”

“It is. We always talk about having our own children. I know he’s ready to be a dad again. It just hasn’t happened yet.”

There’s a physical gap between us from couch to couch. If I were a better sister, I’d get up and close that gap.

“You can’t give up. You just have to keep trying.”

She smiles sadly. “I know. I’m trying not to stress over it and hope it happens naturally.”

“I hope you get it. You always seemed the most motherly out of the three of us. It should have been me, being the oldest, but I don’t have a nurturing bone in my body.”

“That’s not true.”

I scoff. “It most certainly is true. Ask anyone. They’ll tell you how much of a bitch I am.”

“Vik, you’re not a bitch. You’re opinionated and strong-willed. Men don’t always like that in a woman, but it doesn’t make you a bitch. You’ve comforted me before. You saved Mila’s life. You have a nurturing side.”

“Why are you being nice to me? I don’t deserve it.”

Sofiya gets up and closes the distance between us to sit beside me. “Because we’ll always be sisters. So, if there’s anything bothering you, you can tell me.”

It’s on the tip of my tongue. My eating disorder.

But to admit to it would be to admit my shame. It would be admitting I’m not perfect. I’m a mess, and Viktoriya Morozova should never be a mess.

“I’m fine,” I reiterate. The moment I say it, I can see the disappointment in Sofiya’s eyes. The way her shoulders slump and her face turns downward.

“Ok. If you say you’re fine, then you’re fine. But just answer me this: Why did you attack Vera?”

“She’s a bitch. I had enough of her attitude.”

Slowly, she cracks a smile. “Fair enough. I’m here, though, if you ever need to talk.”

I want to take her up on the offer, but I remain silent.

Aleksander takes me back to the BDSM club. I agreed to go because my body craves the release he can provide. After my conversation with Sofiya, I need a reminder that I’ll be all right.

“I’m going to push you tonight, Viktoriya,” he says, leading me into a private room decorated in dark woods and brown tones. Seductive. But instead of having a bed like the room we used before, this one is devoid of a bed. In its place is a cage, just big enough for a person to sit in.

I stop dead in my tracks at the sight of it. “What is that?”

“You need to learn to trust me. I know you were locked in a cage at that auction.”

“So … you’re going to lock me up again? How could you?” I pull away from him.

“Because I want you to face your fears. You don’t trust me yet because of what happened at that auction. I need to show you that you don’t have to fear captivity. That you can find freedom within it. You can find freedom in your mind with it.”

I stare at him like he’s fucking crazy. Honestly, he might be a little. Aleksander, after all, came from nothing. Who knows what he had to do growing up in the streets?

“I can’t do that.” I point at the cage. “I can’t.”

He slips his fingers under my chin, making me look up at him. “I know you’re scared. But I’m doing this for you.”

“How is locking me up supposed to help me?”

“You’re bound to your fears, Viktoriya. To your mind. You need to learn to let go. You need to learn to trust me fully.”

---