Page 56 of Bound By Hate (Born in Blood)

I feel like a little girl who’s scared and broken trying to play dress up.

I’m ugly. My face is bruised. I can barely stand up straight from my broken rib. My ankle is still weak. And I’m not as thin as I should be if I want to dance again. I need to be better.

I can’t be broken.

Moving as fast as I can to the bathroom, I force myself to throw up. Instantly, I feel better. I feel in control. I can do this.

I will not be scared of this day. Aleksander willnothave the satisfaction.

A knock on my door makes me scramble upright, which only makes me wince in pain. “Who is it?”

“It’s Sofiya.”

Of course, it is.

Stifling my sigh, I tell her to come in after I’ve rinsed my mouth out.

“Vik,” she says, eyeing my half-naked state. “Do you need help?” I start to answer, but she cuts me off. “Actually, I’m just going to help you. You’ll deny asking for help. Turn around.”

Grumbling under my breath, I do as she says. Within seconds, Sofiya has my dress zipped up and ready to go. “There. You look beautiful.”

“Have you seen my face?”

Her eyes tighten, but she keeps her smile plastered on. “I have. And you still look beautiful.”

“I’m getting married, Sofiya. I should look like a goddess today of all days. But instead, I look like a troll. And I don’t even want Aleksander, and yet I somehow care what he thinks of my appearance.” I hate myself for caring.

“I know this isn’t ideal, but I think it’s for the best. I wasn’t sure how I felt about Aleksander, but he came through. He saved you from evil men. I think he’s a good man. And Mikhail wants you married and taken care of.Iwant you married and taken care of,” she adds softly.

“I don’t want to be hurt again,” I admit.

“Oh, Vik. Neither do I. Mila doesn’t either. We live in a world ruled by men. The Bratva is a dark organization. The only way I’m safe right now is because of Mikhail. It’ll be the same with you and Aleksander. And besides, this way, you can continue to live in Moscow, and we can keep each other safe.”

I shudder. “I want to return to New York. I need to be ready to dance again.”

Sofiya eyes me with pity. “Vik, what if …”

“What if what?” I snap.

“What if you can never dance again? Your ankle is still healing. Now, you have a broken rib. You might never be able to return to dance.”

“Are you trying to make me feel worse?”

She sighs and sits on the bed. I sit beside her, not because I want to, but because my rib is killing me. “No. I’m just trying to get you to see things realistically. I never asked for Mikhail to enter my life, but he did. He wanted me, and he got what he wanted. I was terrified at first, but then we grew close. And now I can’t imagine my life without him. I gave up dance for him.”

“But you never loved it like I do.”

“You’re right. I never did. But, you know, Moscow has a huge ballet company. If you get better, you could easily become a dancer here. You don’t have to return to New York to dance.”

“But Moscow isn’t my home.”

“It wasn’t mine either, but now it is. I’m just trying to get you to be realistic. If you can dance again, you can dance here. And if you can’t dance ever again, you’ll still have Mila and me.”

“And apparently Aleksander,” I mutter.

She laughs and takes my hands in hers. “You need to put aside your pride and do what’s best for you.”

“You really think Aleksander is what’s best for me?”

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