Page 71 of Resisting the Grump

He didn’t finish the sentence. Instead, he disappeared into the bathroom, and we veered towards the sitting area where Noah was reading a biography of Winston Churchill.

“I hope you’re ready to dazzle us with your detective skills,” Grace said as I placed the small chest on his coffee table. “There’s a lot riding on this.”

“There’s nothing riding on this,” I lied. “Unless there’s something rotting inside.”

He closed his book and scooted to the edge of the couch. “No pressure.”

“Or the winning lotto numbers,” I added, to keep things interesting.

He reached for the chest and slid it in front of him. “Nice box.”

“Why thank you,” I joked.

Grace shot me look, and I let the smile fall from my face. Then we sat down and waited for Noah to work his magic. Unfortunately, the way he was tapping on the thing wasn’t inspiring much confidence. It reminded me of the way Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson bang on the desktop computers in Zoolander when they hear the files are trapped “inside.”

“Maybe it would be easier to solve it if you slipped into your pirate costume,” Grace teased.

Noah fought a sly smile. “I don’t think Avery’s ready for the pirate costume.”

“I’m definitely not,” I said, admittedly charmed by the cheesiness of their inside joke. For how serious they could both be in real life, it amused me how willing they were to behave ridiculously in their relationship.

“What’s in the box?” Colin asked, emerging from his bedroom as he finished buttoning his collared shirt.

“It’s a mystery,” I said, noticing his damp hair was starting to curl.

Noah turned the box on its side and smoothed a finger along one edge after another, looking for imperfections that could be popped or wiggled. I bit my tongue, resisting the urge to mention I’d done that at least fifty times. “I underestimated this guy,” he said finally.

I scoffed and everyone looked at me for a second.

“Let me have a look,” Colin said, heading towards the table. “I assume if I solve it, I get to keep a share of the treasure inside?”

“I wouldn’t get my hopes up,” I said. “The last thing the guy gave me was a dog leash.”

Colin squinted at me. “I didn’t realize you had a dog.”

“I don’t.”

“And the orgasms, of course,” Grace said, clearly pleased with herself. “Don’t leave them out.”

I blushed.

Colin turned his attention to the box and dropped to his jean-clad knees beside the coffee table.

“God, those women were funny the other day,” Grace said, the memory softening her focus as she leaned back on the couch. “I’m surprised one of them didn’t offer to be his rebound girl.”

“What happened?” Noah asked, his focus on the box greater since Colin came over.

“Oliver came into the café to flirt with Avery—”

“And buy croissants,” I said. “Which neither of you are in a position to judge, since Noah invented that courting technique.”

“True,” Grace said. “Except he ended up charming a whole group of lunching ladies, and after he left, they wouldn’t stop gossiping about whether he was an actor or if he looked familiar because they’d met him in their dreams.”

“Sorry I missed that,” Noah said.

Grace patted his shoulder and ignored his sarcasm. “We probably should’ve put them out of their misery and told them who he was, but their conversation made for such a colorful morning.”

“I bet their conversation still would’ve been colorful if we told them the truth,” I said. “If they realized they were fawning over a professional jerk—”

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