Page 32 of The Shadow

“Yes. Trust me, it’s not a bad stare. You look beautiful.”

“Oh.” Her cheeks flush a soft pink that matches the color on her lips. “Thank you.”

“Are you still nervous about showing up together?” Her eyes shift away from mine briefly and it makes my stomach drop.

“Not nervous, I guess, but… I just don’t want it to be a thing, you know? With Blaire and Juliette about to give birth soon, I just don’t want to take away from the focus.”

“You mean if they know—about us?”

“Yeah, I don’t want them worried about me and everything going on with work. It would be complicated to explain so I’d rather just keep it between us if that’s okay?”

It’s clear that either she and I are on two different pages when it comes to us, or to her, the only us that’s happening right now is our pretend situation because I stepped in to help her.

“Yeah.” I smile, letting her relax. “Of course.”

“Thank you”—her hand reaches out to rest against my bicep—“again, for everything.”

“You don’t need to keep thanking me, Aspen. We’re friends, remember?” I wink at her and she smiles. “It’s the least I could do.”

We head out of our building and into my car, driving over to Blaire and Jimmy’s house. I flip on the radio during the drive, hoping it distracts from my shift in mood that I’m doing a piss-poor job of hiding.

I remind myself that once I’m at Jimmy’s with a cold beer in hand and the guys to distract me with conversations about work and how bad the Cubs are doing this year, I’ll be just fine.

“Oh my God, you’re alive!” Blaire waves her arms at Aspen as we walk up the sidewalk to their house. “I’d get up to hug you, but Jameson has vanquished me to this chair.” She scowls before standing to throw her arms around Aspen. “Oh my God, I’ve missed you so much.”

“Look at you.” Aspen’s joy is evident in her voice and the look on her face as she places her hands gently against Blaire’s pregnant belly.

“Jules and Alex aren’t here yet but when you see her, you’re going to scream; she is practically minutes from popping.”

“Doesn’t Luka have a bet on that due date?” I ask Jimmy as he hands me a beer.

“I sure do,” Luka says from behind us. “She didn’t deliver yet, did she?” He looks around, a baby bag on one arm, his daughter Daisy in his other arm, who claps and coos when she sees her uncle.

“Not yet,” Jimmy confirms, reaching his hands out toward his niece. “There’s my girl.” He melts the second he sees her every time. To think he almost considered not being a father is crazy because the man is a natural.

“Speak of the devil.” I nod toward the black Challenger that pulls up, Alex and Juliette climbing out with Juliette’s daughter Chloe running up the sidewalk ahead of them.

“Oh God,” Harper groans when she sees her friend waddling up the sidewalk with a tired grin on her face. “I remember that feeling.” She walks toward Juliette with her arms outstretched.

“Let’s just get it out of the way now. Yes, I’m huge,” Juliette says in her calm, classy manner, “and yes, I’m still pregnant. But most importantly, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“She’s at her limit with it,” Alex reiterates.

My eyes wander away from the conversation toward the deck where Aspen laughs with Harper, her skin a healthier shade of pink rather than the sallow pallor it had been a few weeks back. I question what made me not approach her the times I’ve seen her in mixed company over the years. I noticed her the first time I met her, her quiet yet good-natured demeanor a calm relief from the usual chaos that surrounds my life.

Too lost in thought, I don’t even notice when the guys stop talking and walk over to put food on the grill.

“I’m not even going to bother asking you what you’re thinking about.” I turn to look at Jimmy who’s standing just behind me. “So she’s the neighbor, huh?”

Considering he and the guys have been giving me shit for months about my mysterious new neighbor I stupidly admitted being interested in, I know him and the rest of the guys put two and two together since we showed up in the same car.

“Yup.” No point in denying it now.

“Does she know?”

Know I’m attracted to her? Yeah, she got that message loud and clear.

Know I want more than my pattern of fuck buddies and one-night stands? Still haven’t found the time to bring that up.