Page 77 of Vicious

“The landlord can’t get to it just yet,” he says, but I can tell he’s not telling me the whole story.

“Baba, we don’t have time,” I tell him. “Let’s go to a hotel. All right? I’ll take a shower there, then we can get something to eat, and I’ll explain.”

“It’s 3 a.m.,” Baba says. “Whatever is wrong can wait until the morning.” He draws me into the small house.

It’s the place we’ve been renting for a few years, since Baba sold the house to cover some debts. It’s small, but there are two bedrooms. Mine is tiny—smaller than my cell back at Chase’s house. The kitchen is barely big enough for one person. Mrs. Hong would be hard-pressed to make a gourmet meal here.

It really doesn’t feel like home at all. Never mind the lack of luxury. It’s just a place we’re living in because we can’t afford anywhere else. We could probably downgrade to a one-bedroom if it comes down to it, and I’ll sleep on the couch or set up a cot in the living room.

My mind begins to spiral with all the planning and readjusting I’m going to have to do.

“How much money do we have?” I ask.

Baba grimaces. “Not much. A few hundred dollars. I saved enough to cover the rent.”

A few hundred dollars.

The words are like a physical blow, and I gape at him. Chase had just given him five thousand dollars. I have no reason to think he’d lie about that, but I can’t exactly tell my father I know about the payment. As it is, I’m going to have to try to explain where I’ve been.

“Baba…” I say weakly. “Ch— Those people who took me are going to want me back. Do you understand? We can’t be here when they realize I’m not there anymore.”

“No,” Baba says, shaking his head. “Giulio Pavone wiped the debt. He said so. He isn’t… he isn’t going to want you back.” He gives me a plaintive look. “I was so worried about you. I heard he shut down Ntimacy, and I couldn’t find you.”

I nearly growl in frustration because he isn’t listening to me. “I— We can’t—” I try to tell him something, anything, to get him to listen to me, but I can see that nothing I say is going to change his mind. “Baba, I have the money for a hotel room. I know it’s three in the morning, but I need you to listen to me. All right?” I grip his shoulders, willing him to pay attention to what I’m saying.

Baba gives me a worried expression. “May May… All right. But you’ll have to explain this. If you’re in trouble, I want to protect you.”

Finally. I let out a long sigh and head toward my room, trying not to let his words get to me. Protect me. I force those thoughts away, focusing on the here and now.

“Pack everything you can fit into the car,” I say. I pull the small duffel bag out from under my bed and start stuffing it with all the clothes it can fit. Ironically, I don’t have that many clothes to begin with. I’d made a few things myself, but I’d never been able to justify the cost of new dresses or pants when the old stuff still fit. As long as it wasn’t broken, I could wear it.

And if it broke, I’d patch it up.

I find my purse, wallet and phone still tucked inside. The phone is dead, of course, but I’m not bringing it with me anyway. The few dollars I thought I had in the wallet are gone.

Now that I’ve gotten him to listen, Baba is working quickly, and he meets me at the door soon after I bring my bag there.

I grab the car keys. “Let’s go.” Our old clunker of a car isn’t much to look at, but it gets us from point A to point B mostly without trouble. If it was actually worth anything, we probably would’ve sold it, too, but no one would pay much for it.

That saves some of the precious cash I have because we don’t have to take a cab, at least—as long as it doesn’t break down. Again.

“I still think we could have waited until morning,” Baba says as I drive us out of the neighborhood.

“We’d lose some of our advantage.” I wish I could have showered and rested. I wish I weren’t sitting on my bruised ass, feeling the pain flare out and reminding me of Chase and everything he’d done to me.

“Where have you been?” Baba asks after a while. “I tried to find you.”

“It doesn’t matter,” I answer curtly. “I got out.”

He’s silent after that, and I feel bad about how snappish I’m being. He doesn’t understand, though. He’s never understood. All these years, he’s always been optimistic, so sure that the big break is going to come, that things will turn around.

That’s what I love about him. That’s why I don’t mind being there for him and supporting him, the way he’s always been there for me.

Chase is wrong about Baba. Yes, he has problems, but he’s a good person. He isn’t a “parasite.”

“I’m glad they managed to save your ear,” I say more gently. “I wish I could have been there to help you through it.”

Baba lets out a bitter laugh. “It was hard without you, May May. You always take such good care of me.”

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