Page 58 of Ruining Vanessa

“Just because… Just because they’re worse, doesn’t make torturing them right,” I answer, surprised at how steady my voice is. I think I’m still numb to it all. What’s Slayer going to do if he’s mad at me—cut me up all over again?

Slayer snorts and scratches my scalp lightly. “Yeah. No sugar-coating it. I get off on making people scream. But, for what it’s worth, I… I don’t really want to do any worse to you.”

I wish that didn’t reassure me the way it does. I want to be indifferent to Slayer, and Damien, and Giulio. I want to not care about their moods.

But I do. I can barely handle them when they’re in good moods.

“I… I won’t thank you for that,” I say anyway, even though I don’t feel that confident.

Thankfully Slayer doesn’t seem insulted. He kisses the top of my head again in a strangely intimate gesture.

Tears threaten to spill all over again, and I don’t understand why my own mood is swinging so wildly.

Neither of us says anything else for a while. He doesn’t comment on my tears, and I snuggle into his warmth, pretending he isn’t a monster.

Until a phone rings.

My eyes snap open and I sit upright, the blanket falling away from me.

Slayer looks toward the closed bedroom door. “Must be Giulio’s phone.”

“It hasn’t been an hour,” I say, my voice going high. “He said not to wake him.”

Slayer shrugs. “We’re not the ones who woke him up.” He seems entirely unconcerned, but then, he’s not the one Giulio’s been pissed off at.

“Wait,” I say, a little shakily. “Giulio said there was no cell phone reception up here.”

“Did he now?” Slayer asks, arching his brows at me. He pets the top of my head. “Well, it’s patchy in the woods, but the cabin’s pretty reliable.”

I feel a strange sense of betrayal. “He told me he couldn’t track the GPS. He made me feel like I had a chance.”

The phone stops ringing, and I hear movement in the other room. I tense, and Slayer cards his fingers through my hair, as though he’s really trying to comfort me.

“You never had a chance,” Slayer says matter-of-factly. I flinch away from the words, and he goes on, “But I didn’t need the GPS to find you. Like Jules said, you left a trail even he could follow, and that’s really saying something.”

The door opens, and Giulio walks out, his hair rumpled.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Slayer greets him brightly.

“Ugh.” Giulio walks past us toward the kitchen, staring at his phone the entire time. He stops in front of the cooler to tap on his phone for a few seconds, before finally opening it and pulling out a glass bottle of something. “You want a beer, Slayer?”

“Sure. The most normal one you brought along.”

I don’t know what that means, but my eyes are glued to Giulio. I can’t tell if he’s in a good or a bad mood.

Giulio grabs the beers and pulls another wrapped sandwich out. Then he wanders back to us, and casually takes the armchair across from us. He places the beers on the coffee table.

“Did you seriously leave me only the boring sandwiches?” Giulio mutters as he unwraps his food. “I shoulda bought only turkey and craisins.”

He looks annoyed—because of the food? Because of the phone call? I keep tensing up more and more. Whatever courage I’d found to talk back to Slayer earlier, it’s all gone now.

“Vanessa needed to eat,” Slayer says, and I almost ask him why he hates me again. He doesn’t have to throw me under the bus like this.

“Good to know all the cutting didn’t rob her of her appetite.” Giulio starts chewing on his sandwich, watching both of us closely.

“She was in shock,” Slayer says calmly, and it surprises me that he’d defend me like that. “She needed food and drink. Good thing you brought the shit with the electrolytes.”

Giulio waves him off like he hasn’t even spoken. “I was thinking.”

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