Page 121 of Ruining Vanessa

Slayer nods to him and leads her out. The stairwell door shuts behind them, leaving me and Damien alone.

“You worried?” I ask, smirking up at Damien. “Oh nooo, what is crazy Giulio going to do now?”

Damien kneels down in front of me and sets his hands on my thighs. “Giulio… When I was coming out of the office, I heard one of the girls’ doors slam shut. I didn’t see which one, but I’ll figure it out. Just tell me what you want to do if one of them did push Vanessa.”

“What do you want to do?” I ask.

He grimaces. “I… want to shoot her.”

“Isn’t that kind of boring?” I tap my fingers on Damien’s hand. “Almost kills our blob—”

“Baby,” Damien corrects.

“--and all you want to do is end her life? I think we can make it hurt more than that.” I smile at him. “Or do you want to be merciful? Is this whole white blob of cells turning you soft?”

Damien closes his eyes and takes a few deep breaths. “Vanessa. She could have died. If she’d been near the top when she fell… She’s lucky she didn’t get a concussion or split her head open. I…”

I move to wrap my arms around his shoulders in an awkward embrace. “Yeah. Yeah. So we’re not going to kill whoever it was. We’ll make her hurt a lot worse. We’ll make her regret every single moment she’s still alive.”

Damien hugs me back for a few seconds before getting up. “I’ll check the rooms. You can join Slayer and Vanessa.”

“Don’t trip and fall on the way up,” I say. It’s not funny at all, but I laugh anyway. Damien doesn’t even react. He’s on the second floor and out the door before I’ve gotten up at all.

Fuck.

Fuck.

White blob. It really isn’t just a white blob.

Vanessa isn’t just my baby mama.

I clench my fists, and sit, trying to breathe, trying not to drown in these fucking emotions that want me to simply kill everybody on the second floor just in case they’re the one who hurt her.

It takes me too long to stand up, and I stare at the second-floor landing, wondering if choking the first person I see will make the feelings go away.

This is why it’s good Damien’s around. Managing me. Making sure I don’t fucking destroy something I’ll regret.

Would I regret it?

I resist the urge to punch the wall. A bruised fist isn’t going to help—and I do know that from experience.

Before I do something even I think is stupid, I head out to the main floor. Past Jenna and Paul at the bar, to the VIP room where Slayer and Vanessa are on the couch together, with Vanessa lying out across it and her head in Slayer’s lap. He strokes her hair gently, and she has her eyes closed.

“What did I miss?” I ask cheerfully. “Did Vanessa tell you what really happened?”

“She just keeps insisting it was an accident,” he says, shrugging.

Vanessa doesn’t open her eyes, doesn’t look at me. She shrinks in on herself, curling up a little and burying her face against Slayer’s thigh.

She must be really shaken from the whole thing if she’s turning to him for comfort.

Or she’s terrified of me. Whichever.

I take the armchair adjacent to them and reach for my phone again, only that’s the pocket with the paper in it. I pull it out, staring again. Vanessa had wanted to deliver this to Damien. Why? An invoice, and…

I look at the numbers. It looks right to me, more expensive than when I was personally managing the club, but that’s what inflation does.

“Walk me through this,” I say to Vanessa, putting on a cheerful voice. “You’re going upstairs with this invoice. Why this invoice?”

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