CHAPTER 28
Ryan
TWENTY YEARS AGO
Sitting in the booth at the back of John's Bar and Grille, I waited for my brother. The front door opened, and with a gust of cold air, Alex stepped inside the restaurant. With his dark hair, high cheekbones, and bright blue eyes, I was immediately reminded of our mother. He spotted me and smiled before walking over.
While I didn't know for sure, I had a feeling that Alex’s similarities to our mom were why Father sent him away all those years ago.
"Thanks for meeting me," he says. "You know, Father can't know anything about this."
"I know. I've never told him about any of the times that we've met."
"Good. You should stay on his good side. Trust me, you don’t want to be anywhere else."
Over the years, Father tried to prevent Alex and me from spending too much time together. Sometimes, he would allow Alex to come home during school breaks, but Father was always so angry and cruel towards him that I preferred when Alex stayed away.
Alex flipped open a menu and smiled. "You've got to try the Monte Cristo. Have you ever had one from here?"
"No, but I remember Mom used to make them.”
“It's almost as good as hers." He sets the menu down and leans towards me. "One day, I'm going to own this place. I'm going to make this into the most popular restaurant in New York City. Everyone's gonna want to come to John's. Then I’ll open another restaurant and then another. You’ll see."
I smiled at him, enjoying the thought of his dream, and glad he shared it with me. Despite their differences Father had already decided Alex’s fate. He planned for Alex to join his plumbing business. That’s what he wanted for me, too. I didn’t mind it so much, but I always knew Alex wanted to do something more.
"You wouldn't change the restaurant’s name to Alex's?"
"No, it's not about me. It's about the food." He reaches over and punches my shoulder playfully. "Look at you. Twenty and all grown up. Feels like forever ago that I was twenty.”
“It was only five years ago,” I say.
“I know, but you’ll see. The older you get, the quicker the years go by. By the time we’re forty, life will feel like a freeway. Trust me, you’re twenty now, but tomorrow you’ll blink and be twenty-five.”
I shrug. “I guess.”
“Have you decided what you do with your life?"
I shake my head. "I don't know. I can't imagine doing graduate school like you are. I've been helping Father out with the business. So maybe I'll just keep doing that."
"No, come on, Ryan. You're destined for much more than that. Think about it. What do you want to do?"
"Well, this isn't that bad, really. I got my plumber's license, and we've been growing the business now that we have two licensed plumbers. Father said it's a smart move."
"This isn't about him. This is about you. Is there anything that you'd rather do?”
I was quiet for a minute while I thought, but nothing came to mind.
"I really have no idea. This is all I know."
"And that's the problem. You need to get to school. Go to college. Go away somewhere. Meet new people, learn new things.”
He stopped talking, and I realized that my brother and I didn’t think the same way. We were raised differently. I had a father who raised me while he had to become self-reliant.
“You know, it sucked losing mom and then having to leave so quickly. Father didn't give me a chance to grieve," he said.
"Yeah, I remember that. For me, it was like I lost the two most important people in my life at the same time."
Alex nodded. "I'm sorry about that. I wanted to be there for you.”