So, the second option is that I will die of hunger in my room.
I quickly rush back to my room from the doorway, praying that she doesn't see me.
I'm still too ashamed to face her.
I'm back in my room again.
Several missed calls from my father, an empty stomach, and my chest tightly clenched with guilt.
At this rate, I think I might just slump and die because this is just worse than any form of torture.
If I want to survive, I have to do the right thing. What's the worst that can happen?
I put on my big boy shoes and let out a deep sigh. Yeah, I'm doing this.
I walk out my door and head for the nursery where I believe she'll be.
“Winnie?” I call out, as I stand by the nursery’s door.
Obviously not expecting anyone, she jerks up in shock, almost hitting her head.
She turns to face me and there’s a scowl on her face.
Shit. I’m in for it.
“Please, can we talk?” I ask in a voice I can barely recognize as my own.
“About what?” she asks, crossing her arms over her chest like a petulant child.
“Uhm… about last night?” I say, rubbing the back of my neck, feeling my heart race like a teenager about asking his crush to be his prom. Only that, this is worse than that.
She tilts her head, looking at me up and down. “And what about last night?” she asks, cocking an eyebrow.
I sigh shifting uncomfortably on my feet. She’s pissed.
“Well, I'm sorry about last night. It was inappropriate— I shouldn't have taken advantage of your vulnerability and trust in me, and I don't know why I would even do that. But I swear to God, Winnie, I'll never do that again.” I apologize, staring at her expectantly.
At least if I can't have her to be mine, I can still be friends with her and we'll have a good relationship, at least now she's still Luna’s nanny.
She stares at me like there's a second head on me or I've just been spouting nonsense.
Is my apology that bad? I can't help but wonder while awaiting her response.
Shit, it's late, she hates me already.
“Winnie?” I call hesitantly.
She chuckles lightly, shaking her head. “Whatever, I have bigger fish to fry,” she says coldly, turning away from me and toward sleeping Luna.
Wait, that is it? Does she not care or is she just acting up because she's pissed? I can't help but wonder.
“I'm really sorry, Winnie,” I say, moving closer but keeping my distance so as not to agitate her further.
“You’re disturbing Luna’s sleeping time,” she says, still not looking at me but at Luna, who is still peacefully asleep.
“I just want to be sure you're not offended by me. I'd really love for us to have a good relationship—friendship, I mean, since we obviously must deal with each other.” I say, gesturing at Luna, who's the main reason we're here.
And maybe the fact that I also do care about her. Genuinely.