Page 34 of In The Shadow of The Wolf

“Are you sure you’re up to that? Someone might see us together.” Henry stated the obvious.

“I want to be with you.”

“Okay.”

...

Henry lay in bed that night trying to decide if Terry could do it or if it would be better to just put the guy out of his misery and leave. He didn’t know much about mates, but he felt sure that distance would probably help with the driving need to be together. The adage, ‘out of sight out of mind’ may work. Henry promised him time, and he would follow through, but he planned on heading home after the ceremony. He had a life and a business in Seattle, and he needed to get back to it. The idea of leaving his mate left him with a heavy heart, but the thought of staying and being Terry’s secret lover held no attraction.

...

Terry stared at the ceiling, thinking about everything he’d done wrong since meeting his mate, and it clawed at his insides. He had to get it right; he had to find a way to come out and still maintain his sense of self. It wasn’t that he thought less of gay men; he just thought they were different and different in a way that was not him. After being around Lance after he came out and seeing that being gay was not a sign of weakness, he thought it would be easier.

He would be so much happier if he could be as comfortable in his skin as Lance and Henry. They don’t doubt, and they don’t compromise. He wished that he could be that strong. His friends wouldn’t accept him as gay because being gay meant you were weak to them. They were a bigoted bunch, and he was for a while their leader. He’d done some unkind things and said some very hateful things to people who didn’t deserve his negativity.

Karma was coming back on him, and now he would have to stand in the place of the people he’d bullied over the years. He thought about the lunch date he’d made with Henry and wondered how it would turn out. He wouldn’t hide in out-of-the-way diners and restaurants. Henry was too good for that. He had to be seen to start slow and work himself up to coming out completely.

Henry said he would give him time, but he knew that Henry would grow tired of the games if they went on too long. Besides, he didn’t want to wait too long to present Henry as his mate and everything that went with that declaration. The thought of having Henry beside him in all things, especially in bed, brought a smile to his face and he relaxed and slept.

CHAPTER FOUR

“How did it go last night?” Dean came up to him in the hallway as he was heading to breakfast. Henry knew the man was genuinely concerned for him and not just asking out of curiosity. They continued walking down the hall and toward the kitchen.

“Okay, I think. Terry is trying, but I worry he has too many years of fear and loathing to overcome to ever be a comfortable gay man.” He tried to smile, but it fell a bit flat. It hurt to have a mate that couldn’t love you. It hurt a lot. His years growing up with his stepfather and his stepfather’s family showed him that mates were important and they were precious.

Not all the wolves he’d known were like his stepfather. Some of them were decent people and cared about others. He learned from watching them that mates were special and people who found their mates were envied. He’d dreamed when he was younger of being mated to a wolf and having that individual treat him like he was their sun and their moon.

He’d never known real love and caring except from his late father, and when he first saw Terry and sensed their connection, his heart had soared. He was afraid to hope that they were mates, but the feeling was there, and down deep, he knew. But just as fate had taken his loving father and given him a cold bastard for a stepfather. Fate had granted him a mate but gave him someone who could never openly love him.

“Give him some time. Terry is trying. He really is.” Dean reassured. It surprised Henry considering Dean had been the first to warn him away from Terry.

“What made you change your mind? I didn’t think you trusted Terry to be sincere.” They reached the kitchen, and others were already there eating and chatting. They took a couple of plates, filled them from the setup buffet, and then took their seats next to each other. Obviously, Dean had more he wanted to say, Henry thought as he spread jelly on his toast and waited.

“I always thought Terry was an asshole, especially after the stunt he pulled with Ronan and Molly, but things have a way of working themselves out. I think his mating with you is the Universe’s way of making him into the man he should be. The Universe is telling him to grow up and get real, and it’s up to him whether or not he rises to the challenge.”

Henry took a bite of his toast and stopped to consider Dean’s words. It made sense, but it also could be a bunch of horse shit. Could Terry rise to the challenge of being an openly gay man in a small western town? Terry’s friends were all Pack, and as Pack, they had to get used to and accept an openly gay Alpha and a male Alpha Mate. It seemed to Henry that the foundation for change had been set, and Terry only needed to accept it.

“He invited me to meet him for lunch today,” Henry stated and glanced around the table.

“Where are you going?” Ronan questioned

“He asked me to meet him at the Black Bean.” Henry heard an audible gasp circle the table. It was then that he noticed a man at the far end next to Lance, that was a stranger. The man tilted his head in acknowledgment but did not speak. “Who’s the guy next to Lance?” He spoke softly to Dean.

“He’s the detective from Traverse City who came to pick up Jordan Randall. His name is Ivan Rand, and he’s a wolf shifter from the Traverse Bay Pack in Northern Michigan.” He remembered Terry speaking about him but hadn’t realized the man would look so deadly. The guy was nearly as large as Lance, and he looked lethal with dark brown perfectly cut hair and eyes as black as coal. His body oozed toned muscle and steel control. Henry bet the guy could kill a man with his bare hands and not break a sweat doing it.

“He looks a little scary,” Henry commented lightly.

“He’s the Beta of his Pack and a detective with the Traverse City police force. He’s been on loan to the Michigan State Police for a couple of months. He was put in place to investigate ADA Jordan Randall.” Dean took a long drink of his coffee, nearly draining the mug before continuing. “Apparently, the last guy Randall tried to blackmail into sexual slavery was a member of the Traverse Bay Pack, so they had a vested interest in seeing that he be stopped.” Henry nodded and glanced down the table where Ivan Rand was seated. He was startled when the guy smiled at him. Henry smiled back, realizing that Ivan wasn’t exactly the total bringer of death Henry thought he was. The man had warmth.

...

Terry spent the morning preparing himself for the Black Bean. He was meeting his mate there, and they were going to have lunch. He was going to give his mate all the attention that he deserved. With a deep breath, he headed out the door at 11:35. They had agreed to meet at noon, but he wanted to be there before Henry and get himself acclimated.

He took a booth at the front and glanced out the large plate glass window that looked out onto the main street, and watched for his mate to appear. He’d been sitting there for about five minutes when Kelvin Minter walked in and sat down across from him. He and Kelvin had attended school together and played on the high school football team. They weren’t close friends, but they hung out once in a while. Kelvin was good friends with Gary, Terry’s close friend, so it was sort of like friends once removed.

“Hey Terry, you look like you’re waiting for someone. Mind if I join you until my wife gets here?” Kelvin didn’t wait for confirmation; he just sat his ass down, motioned the waitress over, and ordered a cup of coffee.

“Henry Grange, Ronan’s cousin, is meeting me for lunch. We’re going to discuss the ceremony. He has some questions.” Terry knew he was lying but couldn’t stop himself. Now was not the time to come out of the closet. He was meeting an acquaintance for lunch, and that was all it was.

---