Page 157 of South Beach Bodyguards

This had all been such a fucking mistake. I should have never made her mine after she had already been his.

Miranda glanced at me. She looked exhausted. There were dark smudges under her eyes and her mascara was smeared. Her cheeks were pale and she had her arms crossed over her chest, rubbing her elbows. “Can you just take me to my parents’, please? I don’t want to go back there tonight.”

I opened the door to the parking lot for her and hesitated, not sure what to say. But then I decided after all of this I deserved more than her cool politeness. “No. I’ll take you to Lola’s. We can stop and pick the cat up.”

She shot me a glare. “I don’t think it’s up to you. I can go where I want.”

I had her gun and mine, both released back to us in my waistband and I adjusted them. “Miranda. I’m not going to argue about this and I’m not going to roll over and go quietly. We have a few things to talk about.”

“I’m exhausted,” she snapped as she went through the door, chin up.

“And you might be pregnant,” I said baldly. “So you can give me five fucking minutes. You gave Max five years.”

Miranda opened her mouth, then promptly shut it again. She got into the car silently and I did the same. I didn’t even know where to begin with this conversation.

But then suddenly she spoke as I pulled out of the parking lot. “Go to Peacock Park. I want to see the water.”

It seemed like a weird request to me. “You can see the water at Lola’s house.”

The look she gave me made my balls tighten.

“Just do it.”

“Damn,” I said, suddenly amused. “I’m not used to you being bossy. I kind of like it.”

“None of this is funny.”

That was a huge understatement. “No, it’s not.”

At the park she didn’t wait for me but just started walking towards the water. The sailboats docked at the marina were a cluttered white backdrop against the deep blue of the water. I struggled to find the right words. I was the guy who had never wanted a relationship because I had been waiting—for this woman. For Miranda. So I had learned the language of loving women temporarily. For a night. Maybe two. I knew how to charm and coax and cajole and laugh with a woman. I knew how to make her scream in pleasure.

What I didn’t know was how to communicate truth. Genuine emotions.

So I didn’t know what to say to Miranda to express the depth of what was going on in my damn heart. Hell, I wasn’t even sure I could identity all that jumbled mess myself.

She didn’t seem to know what to say either. She sat down on the ground by the edge of the dock, crossing her ankles in front of her and leaning back onto the palms of her hands. I sat beside her and raised my knees, resting my arms on them. My suit was wrinkled and I wished I were wearing nothing but my underwear. I wanted to wash the whole damn day off of me.

Miranda sighed. Then she finally spoke. “All I wanted was a baby.”

And fuck if that didn’t hurt. I didn’t want it to hurt, but it did. She hadn’t ever wanted me. Not really. Same old shit. Max got trust and loyalty and I was in his shadow. I hoped they threw the book at him.

“You might have one in nine months,” I said. “So I guess it’s a win for you.” It made my gut clench. I pictured her handing me papers to sign over rights to the kid. That wasn’t what I wanted. But at the same time I wasn’t sure I wanted to be with Miranda. She had lied to me. About everything.

“I don’t think so,” she said. “I will probably be ovulating next week.”

“Well, good luck with that.” I turned to look at her. “I’m out. I’m sorry, Miranda.”

She didn’t seem surprised but she was upset. She chewed her fingernail. “I thought you wanted thirty days.”

“I did. But I thought you were being honest with me.”

“I was honest with you, Alejandro. I didn’t lie to you.”

“You just left out the whole fact that you knew all about Max’s shady shit and that you were even involved in planning his disappearing act so he wouldn’t go to prison. That’s a lot different from you pretending for five years to be scared that he was dead.”

Miranda pursed her lips. “I wasn’t pretending. I really thought he was dead.”

I wanted to explode. To demand she admit once and for all Max was a prick but I realized that deep down it didn’t matter. What mattered was that her heart was a vault and I had no entry to it. No damn code. She had me shut out and she always had. I had been nothing but an idiot. “Too bad he’s not. You could have milked that abandoned widow shit forever.”

---