Page 85 of When Love Is Lost and Found

I sit on Dad's favorite chair across from the sofa because sitting next to her without touching her would be torture.

"I'm moving back home," she begins. "Rick is looking for an apartment closer to work to cut down on his hour-long commute every day. Betty and Anthony are getting married in November, and they'll be moving in with me. I'm also enrolling in college."

"That sounds like a great plan. I'm happy for you."

"Thank you."

"Sharon, I'm so sorry," I say.

"I know. You tried to tell me, and I didn't listen."

"Not knowing what happened to Jimmy was always more important to you than knowing what I'd been through. I chose to respect your wishes."

"Do your parents know?"

"Yes, and before you ask, Loren does too. They know how I feel about you and begged me to tell you, but it never seemed to be the right time."

"You're right, but this, this is something you should have forced me to hear."

"There was no way I was going to force you to hear something you were adamant about not knowing."

Her calm and resigned demeanor makes me realize what we were building, what we almost had, is over.

"Do you forgive me?" I ask, bracing myself for the answer.

"The accident was no one's fault."

"Then why are you so distant, so cold?"

"I'm really not trying to be," she says, "but the trust between us was broken when someone other than you had to tell me what happened."

"I tried to tell you!" I exclaim, throwing my hands up in exasperation.

"You should have tried harder."

"I wanted to spare you more pain!"

"As painful as it is, I'm cognizant of the fact that what happened to Jimmy was not your fault. Your choosing to keep it from me is, and it's a lot more painful."

She stands up and walks away, indicating that our conversation is over. She opens the door and looks back at me.

"I lost my happily ever after, not once but twice. Goodbye, Jon."

"Goodbye."

Chapter 17

Sharon - Four Years Later

Betty, Anthony, and I look at each other and smile as we move our tassels from the right to the left and then toss our caps high up in the air. When I bend over to pick up my cap, I look at the pretty opal gemstone on the class ring I now wear on my ring finger. I reflect on the fact that the most important person in my life missed my high school graduation, and tonight, Loren is the one missing from the audience at my college graduation.

After I left Garrison, Loren and I kept in touch, talking on the phone several times a week. When she moved to Los Angeles a year later, we picked up where we left off. I spent more time with her than with anyone else. Betty and Anthony joked that I should have paid her rent because I spent more time in her house than in ours. Loren was my best friend and closest confidant for the last three years.

She passed away two weeks ago, leaving a great void in my heart. The Linders were at the funeral, so I got to speak to them briefly. Noah, who's now eight, recognized me immediately.

"Shay!" he exclaimed, running to me and hugging me tightly.

"Hi, Noah! You've gotten so tall. I missed you so much." I couldn't help but get emotional.

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