Page 80 of When Love Is Lost and Found

I wait a few minutes. Thinking she's fallen asleep, I get up to leave.

"Wait," she says. "Don't leave."

I sit back in the chair, clasp my hands together, and wait.

"When you were here yesterday, I was awake."

I'm sure she sees surprise register on my face.

"I heard every word you said."

My heart sinks thinking back on all the things I said to her.

"You said you don't remember what I said when you were three. I remember, and I will tell you exactly what I said."

I don't know if I want to hear it, but I freeze and let her talk.

"Your father and I had taken you to the park. He was in the men's room when you took off on your tricycle like a bat out of hell. It was a tricycle, for Pete's sake. How fast could you go? Well, you fell and scraped your knee. I picked you up, but you wouldn't stop crying. You kept screaming, 'I want Daddy!' over and over again until I lost my patience."

"Stop, Mom," I say softly.

"I was never enough for you," she says.

"Mom, please."

"From the moment you were born, Jack only had eyes for you. You were his universe."

Another reason she resents me.

"A woman with her young son approached us and had the nerve to ask me if I was your mother. Can you believe it? There I was, standing over my kid who looked just like me, yet someone had the nerve to ask me if I was your mother."

The sinking feeling I experienced all those years ago sweeps over me all over again, and in an instant, I remember everything.

"Mom, I beg you. Please stop." The tears behind my lids threaten to burst out, but I refuse to let them.

"When I couldn't stand your crying a second longer, I told you to shut up, but you wouldn't listen. 'Daddy! I want my Daddy!' you cried."

"I don't want to hear it," I say, but it's too late. The words are already spilling out of her mouth, and nothing will hold her back.

"’Your daddy is not your daddy,’" she says, laughing. "I told you to stop crying, but you refused, so I repeated it. ‘Your daddy is not your daddy,’ and I even gave you a little shake for good measure."

I remember her nails digging into my arms.

"You're lying," I say. "You just want to hurt me."

"No, Sweetie. I'm not lying. Go ask your uncle Caleb."

"You're lying," I say quietly.

"You were a mistake. A one-night stand with Caleb's best friend."

"I don't believe you. I don't believe you!"

I stand and walk to the door.

"Sit down, Sharon. I'm not done. You had your chance to say your peace. Now it's my turn. Sit down!"

I sit down, knowing nothing she says after this could be worse or hurt me more.

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