Page 48 of When Love Is Unexpected

When she sits, she pats a spot next to her, inviting me to join her.

"What does that look like?" I ask, sitting next to her.

"What?" she asks. "The spark?"

"Yeah, what exactly are you looking for?"

"That's just it," she says. "I don't know."

She inches over on the couch until she's close enough for me to put my arm around her. I do.

"You've never been in love?" I ask.

"Have you?" she asks.

"Yes," I say. "Twice."

"Tell me about them," she says.

"You first."

"I've had two boyfriends," she says, "but I wasn't in love with either one."

"Eric, and who else?" I ask.

"His name is Brian," she begins. "We met in college and dated for two years. He's from Florida. Our feelings for each other were strong, but our family ties back home were stronger. Neither of us was willing to move so we could be together. That's when I knew I wasn't in love. I couldn't see myself moving for him."

"You never mentioned him. Do you two keep in touch?"

"We did until he started dating someone else. They got married two years ago."

"Did she move to Florida to be with him?" I ask.

"No," she says. "He moved to Montana to be with her."

"Did that hurt you?" I ask. "The fact that he was willing to move for his now wife but not for you?"

"I didn't make him choose, nor did he ever ask me if I would leave Cold Spring, but we knew. We broke up before it ever became an issue."

"What about Eric?" I ask. "He lives here."

"He fell," she says. "I didn't. As much as I tried, something was missing. He told me he was in love with me, and I couldn't say it back. Enough about me. It's your turn."

"I met Patricia in the seventh grade. We were high school sweethearts. We dated for four years. I wanted a career, a house, a white picket fence, and a family that included children. She wanted the same things, except the kids. She broke up with me when I told her I wanted to marry her."

"I'm sorry," she says. "You loved her enough to marry her?"

"I proposed. She turned me down."

"Wow, that's heavy. I'm so sorry."

"It was a long time ago. I got over it."

"You said twice. What happened with the other one?"

"I never told her how I felt," I say.

"What?" she asks, craning her neck to look at me. "She never knew?"

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