Page 87 of Seizing Control: Part Two

“No, she won’t.”

“She will... she forgave me.” I leave the current state of our relationship unsaid because I figure it will be fixed eventually. Time and devotion. I have both in abundance when it comes to regaining Lily’s trust. “Just man up. Admit your mistakes. Try to make amends.”

“The shit I did...” Misery clouds his gaze. He sniffs and dashes at his eyes with the back of his hand. “I raped her.”

As my stomach churns, I fight to keep my cool. “Are you sure?”

I know Lily. Her demons are quietened by consensual non-consent—a term I had to learn five years ago when I was scared that she’d accidentally cut herself too deep and die on me. My guilt was already too heavy. I failed her. Let Alex hurt her. The last thing I could endure was losing her forever to the trauma caused by the attack, so I made it my mission to find a way to help her break without causing permanent damage.

Forced submission.

Lily’s kink is as vital to her survival as conventional therapy.

It was a carnal deviancy that fit with my own personality.

Craving to break free of my control, the animal inside me yearned to dominate.

To find my equal in Lily, despite the circumstances that lead us to this discovery, was a dream come true. I set Venom free, and my sweet thing unleashed her claws and fought me the entire way. We would duel. Battle. Take what we needed for the other.

I would never let my craving hurt her.

She wouldn’t look at me like a threat afterward.

“Yep.” Slash’s voice is clipped.

“You might be mistaken.” Letting go of his chin, I dig my fingernails into my palms to stop from pumping the remaining bullets in his weapon into his head. “I told you to break her for her own good—that’s not rape.”

Even the word makes me wild.

Goads me into forgetting my remorse.

I will kill him if he’s fucked Lily without her permission.

“The ritual was... bad,” he whispers. Staring directly ahead with unseeing eyes, Slash adds. “They threatened her. Made me fuck her in front of them to make the union real.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“Wasn’t the only time... that was just the first time. She makes me crazy. Turns me into a monster.” Before I can question him further, he confesses in a hushed tone, “I like it.” Heart in my throat, I lean closer, breathing in his honesty like a starving man. I’ve never had the words to explain the affect Lily has on me, but hearing them out of the mouth of a man I once respected more than any other is illuminating. “Want to see how far I can push her boundaries. Want to break her. Need to bend her, humiliate her, make her cry... and I think she needs it too.”

Slash’s quiet declaration hangs in the air.

It blankets the bathroom, thicker than the steam that lingers above our heads.

“I’m the same,” I tell him. He lifts his head, meets my eyes of his own volition for the first time. Blink for blink, we scrutinise each other in our search for new common ground to replace the camaraderie we lost. “But Lily doesn’t just need it... she craves it. Would even go as far as to say she enjoys it.”

“So, I’m not bad for her?”

“Nah.” I shake my head. The blood that continues to run down the side of his face picks up pace, and I second guess my decision to put him in the shower. “Think you might be perfect for her.”

The relief that fills his expression boosts his pallor a couple of shades.

“Stay, Venom.... ah, Lazarus. I don’t wanna be alone anymore.”

“I’ll answer to either name.” Inclining my head, I verbalise the promise he’s looking for. “Not goin’ anywhere, brother.”

“Good.”

Slash takes hold of my forearm a moment before the colour drains from his face and his eyes roll back in his head. I catch hold of him, just in time to stop his skull from thumping into the hard tiles. Resting his weight against my shoulder, I end up saturated by the shower. It doesn’t matter in the scheme of things.

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