Page 1 of Knowing Trust

1

“Don’t you think you’re taking things a bit far?” a woman’s voice said from the doorway of the study.

I snorted, not even looking up since I knew her voice, and finished reading over what I was focused on before signing it. I moved it to the other pile to be handled now that I had approved it.

I glanced up at Mel with a hostile smirk. “That’s rich coming from you of all people. The woman who wanted to kill her best friend and declared sister because I denied you your vengeance to keep you alive.” I continued when Mel opened her mouth. “And then you made it like a twelve-fucking-step process to forgive me which was severely off the mark. So really?”

She ground her jaw but then gave a swift nod. “You’re right. I deserve all of that.” She adjusted her neck, still not able to take criticism very well and I was poking at her bullshit. “But don’t you maybe think that makes me the exact right person to call you out on this?”

I was about to verbally spar some more with her, but then my magic warned me to stop. I checked my simmering annoyance that seemed to be my default setting now and studied her.

Mel was scared. Worried. She wasn’t here for a fight but out of genuine concern and knew I would give her shit for coming, but she did anyways. That gave me pause, and I swallowed down my annoyance to give her a real answer.

Except then she pulled out her phone and played that ridiculous fucking clip that was all over supe social media of me.

“Look, as much as we all can be stupid, people aren’t actually dumb—especially not as much as supe media believes to constantly tell them lies,” I told Stefanie in between classes right after Luke had died.

Clearly, we hadn’t known we were being recorded.

“Yes, of course, but I think it better that you set the record straight instead—” she tried to reason.

“What is there to set straight?” I growled. “I worked with someone in the Underground. Am I really the first to work with a spy or turn an asset? Is this some foreign concept supes can’t handle because humans have whole agencies dedicated to get spies in to check on bad guys. Hell, watch a damn Bond movie. Yes, I worked with a bad guy to take down the even worse guys.

“What is there to explain? Is it advanced calculus? Do they want to know if we wore matching Tom Cruise outfits and did things Mission Impossible style? We’re not going to confirm operational shit anyways, and I doubt the average person fucking cares, Commander. No, it’s the nosy leaders and media wanting to bait people in this story.

“We’re taking down the Underground. That is the fucking story. That is what the average supe cares about. That we’re taking out the threat that their councils and leaders couldn’t—didn’t even really know was such a threat until I fell into this world. So yeah, the news is blowing up that I worked with a spy. Let them look stupid. Let them try to make me look stupid with this.

“So what? Like… It’s a Thursday and the media is coming after me. Oh no, let me clutch my pearls and get defensive. I did work with a spy. We confirmed it. You guys all knew, and some of you didn’t like it. Some of you knew the intel was good, and he wanted the Underground finished more than we did.”

“Yes, and you’re right that the ‘enemy of my enemy is my friend,’” she cut into my rant. “We just think that you should go on the record saying that, Your Highness.”

I sighed and rubbed my hand over my hair. “Stefanie, that’s a waste of time and gives oxygen to the fuel of these fools. If they can force me to comment and confirm I’m not an idiot who… I don’t even remember their latest accusation. I was chasing wolf tail for another possible mate? Whatever, Luke had his mate, and they don’t know shit.

“But this takes us away from taking down the Underground. I know this might sound a bit paranoid, but I’m not always wrong. Do you think maybe some of these stories are a smoke screen to distract us so we’re not focused and some of the baddies can get away? You don’t think the Underground has ever paid off the media or friends there?”

“That didn’t go over well,” Mel said as the recording finished.

“Yeah, well, clearly they loved me since there was more to what was said and that we needed to be smarter and address the real issues or once we got all the criminals,” I drawled. “Or all the idiots barking at the moon tired themselves out and I could say a few quick words. Which is what I plan to do. I’ll talk to fairies, and whatever we will show to supes they can play on their media.”

“You want to report the victory along with the story of Luke,” she muttered.

I opened my mouth but then closed it as I stood and stretched. “I think that’s Neldor’s plan. I don’t know that I’ve gotten that far.” I sighed when worry filled Mel’s eyes again. “I’m—well, I’m not fine. I’m not okay. I’m not in this dark hole that—”

“You had Neldor sedate you,” she argued.

I sighed. Heavily. “This is not for public knowledge, but I can practically feel you vibrating with worry, and I appreciate it.” I waited until she nodded. “I had another power level jump two days before. Yes, I was fucking upset to the max. I was being safe. I’m still upset. I’m not denying that. I’m fucking upset he died.”

“But?”

“But it’s not like I lost Izzy or you or one of the guys. Or even one of the commanders.” I let out another heavy sigh and leaned against the desk. “I don’t know how I saw this ending any other way. He wasn’t walking off into the sunset when this was all over. He’d committed too many crimes, and I would have been the bad guy if I’d let that go.

“And his soul was broken after how his mate died and all he took on himself. I don’t know, Mel. I knew from the beginning Luke wasn’t one I could save. It just played out this way, but I was ready for it. I’m fucking pissed he did it this stupid. I’m pissed this is how his life played out. But I’m not like locked up with this.”

She didn’t respond at first. “You know yourself best. You’re just worrying people.”

I snorted. “I’m the only heir and option for Faerie. People worry if my farts smell funny.” I felt better when she burst out laughing and clearly believed me. I wasn’t lying.

Life sucked, but I wasn’t drowning in darkness or anything.

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