Page 118 of Rebel

“I mean it. She’s just a friend, a very good friend, but if it makes you uncomfortable?—”

I try again. “Trav.”

“I only went that night to try and stop myself from making a move on you. I know I wasn’t allowed to, and it was killing me, so I thought if I could get you out of my mind, I could be your friend. It was stupid. I knew it was the moment I stepped into that room, and it went no further. In fact, we spoke about you that night instead, about how I was obsessed with you?—”

“Trav,” I interrupt, kissing him to silence him. “You sweet, silly man. It’s fine. You don’t owe me anything about your past, just like I don’t owe you anything about mine. Yes, I was jealous for a moment, but that’s for me to deal with, not you. All that matters is now. You’re in my bed, at my side. I’m tired of looking backwards, so how about we just look forwards?”

“You’re sure?” he asks, searching my gaze.

“I’m sure. Besides, I like Reign. She’s cool as hell. I get it.” I wink. “We are all that matters. Don’t you agree? Not who came before, just us now. They all molded you into this amazing man I love.”

“I love you,” he whispers as he kisses me. “From the moment I laid eyes on you. This is forever, Beck, no matter what. You have to know it’s never been like this. You have every broken edge of me. I’m not perfect, and I don’t pretend to be, but I’m all yours. Every flawed inch of me. The real me, not the one on stage but the one before you.”

“I know,” I murmur lovingly as I trace his face with my eyes. “You have me as well, for what it’s worth.”

“A whole fucking lot,” he growls, kissing me. “You are worth losing everything for, Beck, and the sooner you realize that, the better. If you asked me to give this all up, I would. I’d do anything just to be at your side. They call us rock gods, baby, but the truth is, you make us men. You make us nothing more than men in love. Without you, there is no music in my soul anymore, so when you’re struggling, I’ll be right here, even if you don’t want to talk. I’ll still stay right here, at your side, through it all. Remember that.”

“Thank you.” I kiss him softly before he deepens it, pushing me back to the bed.

“Yo, horny teenagers, the car is here for the rehearsal!” Chase calls, making us break apart with a laugh.

“Come on.” I take his hand, and we head downstairs.

FIFTY-FOUR

Beck is still quiet. It’s obvious something is troubling her, but I meant what I said. She can talk if she wants to, but if she doesn’t, that’s okay too. However, when we reach the rehearsal space, we all pretend to set up as she wanders around, stopping when she spots it.

Her mouth gapes open.

We stopped the Polaroid tradition after her sister because it made us too sad, so instead, we started a new one.

Above the sofas but below our band logo is a large photo of us. It was taken at the tour party the other night. Beck’s eyes are glazed, and her smile is bright. She looks so free and happy. She has her arm around Kolton and her legs across me. Chase is leaning over her, looking into the camera with a naughty grin. We all looked so happy in that when Reign sent it to me, I knew instantly what we should do with it.

“You’re forever Beck Danvers. You are eternal. You’re a Dead Ringer,” Chase says. “That just solidifies it.”

“It’s beautiful,” she whispers, turning to us with a watery smile. “You bastards.”

That makes us laugh as I head to the drums to prepare. She’s picking up our songs quickly, and we’ve worked on some new ones, but practice makes perfect, and with a huge tour coming up, the more we practice, the better we can be.

When Beck recovers, even though she can’t stop smiling, we dive into the set list, playing it over and over until my hands bleed and my back aches. Night has fallen, but we keep going, more determined than ever to make it.

BECK

The guys are packing up. It’s the middle of the night, and none of us can play or sing anymore, so we are heading home. While they pack, I collapse onto the sofa, scrolling through my phone.

Reign Harrow (Bae): Men are so annoying. Why do they leave their socks everywhere? And there are never two!

Chuckling, I thumb out a response.

Beck: Because they are idiots. I always find Chase’s underwear everywhere. The man has too many pairs to say he goes commando.

Reign Harrow (Bae): Ew, too much information. Anyway, get back to rehearsing, mega star!

Beck: Get back to matching pairs of men’s socks. #howthemightyhavefallen

Reign Harrow (Bae): FU.

I laugh at the emoji she sends back, then I answer some Instagram messages and comments before snapping a tired selfie with the new portrait in the background and uploading it. The likes roll in, but I shut off Instagram and flop back, closing my eyes as I wait for them to finish.

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