Page 79 of Gilded Fake

“That doesn’t mean you didn’t ask,” she says, holding out her hand to present the proof. “You don’t believe me? I’ve never lied to you, Colt. She’s the liar!”

“I’m not saying I don’t believe you,” I say. “I’m saying I can’t marry you, Dixie.”

“Why not?” she asks, her eyes wide as she waits for the tears to come. I can see her doing it now. I don’t know how it took me so long to figure out she was making herself cry to manipulate me because I always give in when the waterworks start.

“I just can’t,” I say, shifting in my chair. I stuff my hand in my pocket, curling my fingers around the tin. I should have taken two or three before this conversation.

“It’s because of her, isn’t it?” she asks, blinking tears into her eyes.

I face her squarely, refusing to be swayed by pathos. “Yes.”

She stares at me across the table, her eyes brimming. “I knew it,” she whispers. “I knew you’d go back to her if you remembered.”

Now it’s my turn to stare at her. “You knew?”

“Knew what?” she asks, and I see the alarm in her eyes for only a flash, and then she’s backtracking. “I knew you’d leave me for some skinny blonde cheerleader. That’s why I was always jealous of her. You never thought I was good enough.”

“You knew about us hooking up last year,” I say, refusing to let her distract me. “Didn’t you?”

Gloria told me, and I overheard on prom night when I was fucked up, but some part of me thought she was just trying to discredit her enemy.

Dixie swallows, then blinks a tear from her lashes. “I didn’t want to lose you,” she whispers as a tear rolls down her cheek. “I thought you’d finally see that I’m as good as her.”

“You thought if you told me the truth, I might leave,” I correct. “So you lied to me.”

“I didn’t know it was her,” she protests, reaching for my hand. “Not at first. I knew there was someone else, but I thought it was Harper. I only found out at Bye Week this year.”

I pull my hand back. “So… Six months ago.”

“You remembered too,” she argues. “I know you did.”

“Months later,” I say, my voice hard. “You knew the truth, and you kept it from me. And for what? So I’d give you a fucking ring, and you could marry a dumbass who didn’t know better? What if I’d never remembered, Dixie? Would you ever have told me?”

“Why would I?” she demands. “It didn’t matter. It doesn’t matter now. It was a long time ago, and things were good between us when you woke up. You love me, and I forgave you for what you did.”

“Forgave me?” I ask with a snort of disbelief.

“Yes,” she says. “And I forgive you now. We can still be together, Colt.”

“I can’t be with you,” I say incredulously.

“Why not?” she cries. “You’ve slept with lots of girls in the past. Why does this one matter? She’s no different. She’s just one more girl from your past. I’m as good as any of them.”

“I never said you weren’t,” I say slowly. “I never thought you weren’t. You thought that.”

“What was I supposed to think?” she sniffles.

“You were supposed to believe me when I said I wouldn’t have fucked you if I didn’t find you attractive,” I say. “You believed your own insecurities instead. I can’t fix that for you.”

“What do you want me to do?” she asks. “You want me to starve myself until I’m as skinny as Gloria Walton—as skinny as she used to be? You want me to have an eating disorder so you can be proud of your girlfriend? Would that make you happy?”

“I don’t give a fuck how much you weigh or what you look like,” I say, rubbing my temple, where I can feel the edge of the steel plate they put in my skull. “I don’t care if you’re the hottest supermodel in the world. I care that you lied to me.”

“I didn’t lie,” she protests, swiping at a fresh tear. “I just didn’t tell you because it was over, and we were happy, and I knew she’d try to mess up everything we built together. She hates that I took her place. That’s why she’s doing this. Not because she loves you. Because she hates me.”

“I trusted you,” I say. “When I didn’t know who I could trust, I thought it was you. I thought that no matter what anyone else did, what they said, that the one person I could always count on was you. That you’d tell me the truth. But you didn’t.”

“I never lied,” she insists. “I didn’t tell you one little thing! No one in the world would have told you about the girl you cheated with, a girl you got tattoos for. You think I like seeing that on your arms and being reminded every time we hook up? No, but we were in love by the time I found out, so it didn’t matter. Even though you never apologized, we’d moved on. She’s in the past. We have a future together.”

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