Page 22 of From the Ashes

I half laugh. “As okay as I can be.”

Chloe wraps her arm around me and guides me toward the kitchen and away from the office I’m not quite ready to step foot in. Maybe tomorrow.

She sits me at the counter while she moves toward the fridge and starts pulling the ingredients for our joint comfort drink, hot cocoa.

It started when I was a little girl and one of us was upset. We would sit together and drink the chocolaty goodness, and sometimes it helped, and others it didn’t. But it always distracted us for long enough to make things not feel so huge.

“Do you want to talk about why you’ve decided to come home after two months of being gone? Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to have someone else in this big house with me, and even happier to see you, but you know you can tell me anything.”

She slides the mug toward me, and I quickly bring it to my lips, taking a tentative sip to make sure it’s not going to burn me. But I’m not sure what to say. Not because I feel the need to hide anything from Chloe, but because she’s the only person in the world I don’t think will judge me for all that’s happened in the last few months.

“Dean called up from the guard house a little while ago to let us know that four men picked up the car you abandoned in the driveway, each one of them looking like they were ready to storm the gates.” She fishes, and I can’t help but smile at the not-so-subtle attempt to get me to talk.

“I’m not surprised.” I half laugh, but the smile drops from my face a second after it appears.

I let out a steadying breath, my eyes locking with her emerald ones. And then I launch into the entire sordid tale. From Davenport’s men leaving me for dead in the alley to the way the brutal men of the Legion nursed me back to health. I include Kaos handing me over to Davenport and how he made a deal with Knox to save me. Every single detail I can think of, I allow it to pour from my chest as tears fall against my cheeks, right to this morning when I was sent that video.

Chloe listens to every word, never interrupting me as I pour my heart out, and when I’m done, I feel both lighter and completely empty.

I fucking hate that I’m craving their comfort already. I hate that I want nothing more than to be enveloped in Crew’s arms or have Bishop wipe my tears away. I hate that I’d give almost anything for Kaos to tell me I’m going to be okay or for Kovu to threaten to maim anyone who causes me pain. I don’t even doubt that he’d hurt himself if it meant I was happy.

I swipe my tears from my cheeks, my heart aching, and wait for Chloe to say something. To take my side or tell me I’m better off without them. To say that I’ll be able to run the family business better without their influence, or even that I deserve someone who won’t lie to me.

She blows out a breath and takes a sip of her own cocoa as she mulls over all I’ve told her. “There’s a lot to unpack there,” she admits.

“Yep.” I sigh.

“You know I’ve always been straight with you, and I’m not about to change that. Every time you came home from one of your dad’s training sessions covered in cuts and bruises, I reminded you that that’s what you wanted. You wanted to be queen one day. You wanted people to take you seriously.”

I nod, because it’s true. The first time I wanted to give up and tell my dad to train Scott because I couldn’t hack it, I was fourteen and had been held underwater for so long I passed out several times and spent a week in bed with the worst case of the flu I’ve ever had. Chloe sat with me and reminded me that I could throw in the towel, but that’s not what I wanted. She was always there reminding me of why I was doing the things I was doing instead of shopping with my friends and living a normal Mafia princess life.

“There’s a lot I’ve never told you about my life before I came here, Cami. When I was your age, I made the decision to run from my demons, and in the process, I ran from the person that could have given me everything. Much like the men of the Legion, he was well connected, and I knew if I was going to hide from him, it was best to hide in plain sight. Which is how I came to be your nanny and why I never left when you were able to take care of yourself. But the older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve regretted those decisions, but by the time I came to that realization, it was too late. There was no going back.”

She moves her finger around the rim of her mug absentmindedly, her eyes downcast and dejected. This is the most candid she’s ever been with me about her past, and I can see why she’s avoided talking about it because it hurts her. The memories, the decision she made, it all hurts for her to talk about. Her eyes flick up to mine, and tears shine back at me.

“The reason I’m telling you this is because I don’t want you to make the same decisions I did when I was young. I don’t want you to run from something that could be perfect because of decisions that were made before they met you. Of course they could have told you so you didn’t have to find out this way, but would the outcome have changed? Or would you have made the same decision to come home?”

I sigh. Why does she have to be right? “I would have made the same choice,” I admit.

“So perhaps they chose not to tell you because they knew you would run and it’s not safe for you to be out on your own right now?”

I half laugh, but there’s no humor in the sound.

Chloe reaches across the bench and grasps my hand in hers, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Just think about it, okay?”

“I will,” I whisper.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

BISHOP

Imassage my aching temples as I listen to our casino manager detail every single thing that’s happened since the time the fight club exploded.

When I asked him to give a detailed rundown on the comings and goings of the place, I didn’t realize I’d be sitting here for an hour hearing about how the mayor lost half a million dollars last night or how the district attorney went home with a woman who was most definitely not his wife, but I tuck all the information away in case I need it in the future.

The door to my office opens, and I look up to see Crew standing in the doorway, his eyes downcast and his hands fisted in the pockets of his sweatpants. I can’t remember the last time I saw him wear anything other than a suit during the day, but today has been a clusterfuck of epic proportions.

Wyatt gave us the all-clear to return to the compound after assuring us that Caleb has been removed from the security system, but it doesn’t feel right without Camilla here. She brought life to a house that had never really been home, and now she’s gone, now she’s locked herself up in her own ivory tower, and there’s nothing left here but the monsters that have always walked the halls.

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