Page 7 of Monsters in the Dark

“I do,” I answered. “However, it comes with a side of a I-wish-I-were-dead-hangover.”

The man grinned, and his eyes went from tired to mirthful, making him a lot more attractive than I had originally given him credit for. At about six-foot, he had dark blonde hair, hazel eyes, and had that clean-cut baseball look about him. Not one tattoo in sight, but I’d bet that any tattoos on his body would be a homage to his mother or family. He looked very nice, very presentable, and very safe. He’d probably be horrified to find out that I knew how to snap a man’s neck in two.

“Maybe just a whiskey,” he replied. “I have to work tomorrow.”

“That really is the horror of needing a drink on a Thursday,” I quipped. “Any particular brand?”

He shook his head. “Whatever you have open is fine.”

Yeah, very safe.

Porgy just finished arranging the towels when I reached for the house whiskey. “So, what did you end up telling her?”

“I told her that I wasn’t going to inconvenience someone like that,” he answered, picking up from where we’d left off. “I also reiterated my previous point. We’ve only been seeing each other for a few weeks, so a family wedding is way too serious an event for where we are right now.” He visibly shivered. “Christ, I can only imagine how many people would ask us when we’re next.”

I laughed as I poured the whiskey. “That’s why I’m single.”

Porgy nudged my hips with his thigh. “You’re single because predictability bores you.”

Tossing him a wink, I grabbed the tumbler of whiskey, then walked over to Baseball Guy. “Here you go,” I said, placing the glass in front of him. “While it can’t erase your troubles from your mind, it’ll help you sleep better tonight.”

He smirked as he reached for the glass. “The crying one-year-old that I have at home says otherwise.”

I winced. “Teething?”

“That, or else he just hates me,” he replied, making my lips twitch.

“That’s always a possibility.”

“The only consolation is that he seems to hate his mother, too.” I finally laughed at that. “We’ve tried everything, and that kid just doesn’t seem to care that he’s driving us crazy.”

“And then, one day, he’s going to be graduating from high school, and you and your wife will be wishing that you had these sleepless teething nights back again,” I said.

He smiled again. “Ain’t it the truth.”

“Miss?”

I knocked on the wood once before walking over towards the two females that had just sat down at the bar. While Baseball Guy was dressed like he’d just gotten off work, these two were dressed for dick, and good for them.

“What can I help you with, ladies?”

The blonde looked at me boldly. “Can you castrate my cheating fuck of a boyfriend?”

Actually, I could.

Instead, I said, “Uhm, I’m pretty sure that’s not on the shelf tonight.”

“It should be,” her friend harrumphed. “It should be on every shelf in every bar in America.”

“It should be everywhere where there are cheating assholes,” the blonde huffed.

“How about a glass of wine, a shot of tequila, then a nice toast to him getting herpes?” I suggested. “Castration would make one hell of a mess anyway.”

The blonde grinned, but it was easy to see the hurt in her eyes, making me doubly glad that I was single. “Herpes sounds good.”

“Yeah,” her friend agreed. “It’s the gift that keeps on giving.”

“I’ll be right back.”

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