Page 58 of Drive To Survive

“Is that him?” Paul said, ignoring my request, his eyes glued to the screen in the corner of my living room. “The guy you cheated on me with?”

My mouth gaped wide open, and I just stared at him for what felt like minutes, but in reality, only seconds passed us by. Paul didn’t shift his focus the entire time I sat there, stunned into silence by his question.

“Cheated on you?” I bit out.

“Yeah,” he said, sliding his eyes to mine. “It’s clear to me you’ve been fucking that guy. He’s lucky I didn’t smack the proprietary expression off his face.”

I choked out a laugh. “I’d like to see you try.”

“Cripples turn you on, do they, Ev?” he asked, a cruel tilt to his lips.

I ground my teeth together. “Nico is not a cripple.”

“I did a little research on him while you were putting Rhett to bed. No wonder you spread your legs for him. He can certainly afford to pay you. Although, you must have improved in that department since I last had you. As I recall, you were pretty lame in the sack.”

Rage built within the pit of my stomach, like a hot spring unable to deny the force of the earth beneath it. I dug my fingernails into my palms, willing myself to remain calm. I couldn’t afford to lose it, not with Rhett in the next room.

“I’d like you to leave, Paul,” I said, changing my mind about the setting of boundaries. “Right now.”

He sipped his drink, his eyes returning to the TV. “I’ll go when I’m good and ready. Besides, I can’t afford that motel for much longer, so I’ll be moving in here by the end of the week. Find a way to deal with it, Ev, because I’m back for good.”

I shot upright, my legs acting independently, sending me into a standing position. I snatched the glass from Paul’s hand, the contents sloshing over the sides. “Get out of my house.”

Paul lazily turned his head and ran his tongue along the underside of his top teeth. “Make me.”

Glowering, I set the glass on the coffee table. “Spare me the veiled threats, Paul. You don’t scare me. And you are not moving in here. I suggest you find yourself a job and a place of your own if the motel is too pricey.”

“I don’t scare you, huh?” He stood, and before I had a chance to move, he snapped a hand around the back of my neck, yanked me hard against his body, and kissed me.

Panic crawled into my throat as I fought to get him off me. I twisted to the side and clawed at him. He let me go as three lines of blood appeared down the side of his face.

“You fucking bitch.”

I ran to the front door, wrenching it open. “Get out. Get out, Paul, or I swear I’ll scream so damn loud the entire neighborhood will come running.”

He went to walk by me, then gripped my chin, painfully digging his fingertips into my flesh. “This isn’t over, Ev.”

The second he set foot outside, I closed the door, turned the lock, and slid the chain into its housing. And then my legs went from beneath me, and I sank to the floor. A sob burst out of me. I clamped a hand over my mouth. If Rhett heard, he’d want to know what the matter was, and I could hardly tell him his father had attacked me. God, for one awful second, I’d thought he was going to rape me, and I wouldn’t have stood a chance of fighting him off. My threat to scream had been just that, a threat. With Rhett in the house, I wouldn’t have risked traumatizing him.

“Nico,” I whispered. “I need you.”

I climbed to my feet and collapsed into the chair. I reached for my phone, the urge to call Nico swelling within me until I could barely stand it. I didn’t call, though. Not yet. I needed to work through what just happened in my own mind before trying to explain it to him. And what if he didn’t want me anymore. I’d put on hold what we had, all in the name of my son, who deserved a much better father than Paul could ever be.

I might have no choice other than to give Paul visitation rights to Rhett, but I’d be damned if he ever set foot in this house again.

My throat felt raw when I awoke the next morning, and my body ached as I eased back the covers and climbed out of bed, probably because I’d spent the entire night tensing every muscle, straining my ears for signs of Paul returning. Why had I allowed him to strut back into our lives without a single explanation of where he’d been? I should have been firmer, told him that if he wanted to see Rhett, he could apply to the courts. But the shock of his unexpected return had meant I’d gone into a kind of daze. I’d spent so long praying for his return, at first for myself and Rhett, and eventually just for Rhett, that when my prayers were answered, I keeled over, letting him take complete control.

If wishes were kisses… I’d be waking up beside Nico, with Paul a distant, fading memory.

I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror, horrified at the image staring back. Lips swollen to twice their normal size, a slight bruise where Paul’s fingers had dug into my chin, and dark circles beneath my eyes. In all the years I’d known him, he’d never behaved violently toward me, yet last night that violence had appeared from nowhere, igniting from barely a spark.

Who was Paul Lawson, and where had he spent the last two years?

I covered the evidence of Paul’s rough treatment with makeup, then padded into the kitchen and put on some coffee. Rhett appeared, yawning loudly, his hair in disarray. “Do I have to go to school today?” were the first words out of his mouth.

“Yes,” I said, forcing a laugh for his sake. “But good try, honey.”

He huffed out a big breath. “Can we go and see Nico after school?”

---