Page 56 of Drive To Survive

“No,” I replied. “Although, if you want it faster, you could help.” I pointed my chin at a bag of potatoes. “Those need peeling.”

He laughed, one short, sharp sound that set my teeth on edge.

“Do you remember me ever helping in the kitchen, Ev?”

Misogynistic bastard.

“Actually, Paul, I struggle to remember you at all.”

His eyes narrowed, then darkened, and his fingers tightened around his bicep. “Why are you so hell-bent on riling me up, Ev?” He pushed upright and took two steps into the small space. “All I’m asking for is a chance to make it up to you.”

I shuffled a few inches to my right. “I’ve told you, Paul, you and I, we’re over.”

He reached out, capturing a lock of my hair and twisting it around his finger. “We’ll never be over. What we had was rare.”

I slapped his hand away and laughed in his face. “Your memory is playing tricks on you, Paul. What we had wasn’t rare. It was… nothing special.” Not like what I had with Nico. Now that was special. Longing swept through me, stealing the air from my lungs.

Paul’s hand curled into a fist, and I stiffened. Paul had never been violent, but people change. I no longer knew this man standing in front of me any more than he knew me.

As quickly as it had arrived, his anger withered away, leaving a faint smile in its place. “You’ll come around. In time.”

I suppressed a snort as he crossed to the sink and poured a glass of water, downing it in one go. He wiped the back of his hand across his face. “Rhett tells me he’s been attending some racing school.”

I braced my spine. “That’s right. He loves it, and he’s good at it, too.”

“I’m sure he is,” Paul said, but there wasn’t a hint of pride in either his voice or his expression. “I’ll see for myself tomorrow, won’t I?”

“You want to come along?” Anxiety gave an edge to my tone, and Paul noticed. He tilted his head to the side, studying me.

“Yeah. Any reason I shouldn’t?”

“No,” I answered, far too quickly.

The screaming in my head violently disagreed. Paul and Nico breathing the same air… Oh God, this is a nightmare. A horrific nightmare I can’t wake up from.

“Great,” he said, swiping a raw piece of carrot off the chopping board. He popped it into his mouth, crunching in a way that set my nerves on edge. “I’ll look forward to it.”

He sauntered back into the living room, leaving me with a churning stomach and a terrible sense of foreboding. I was already dreading taking Rhett to PFK tomorrow. It would be the first time I’d seen Nico since I asked him to give me space, and I had no idea how I’d react or, indeed, how Nico would either. To me and Paul. Attending together felt like rubbing salt in the wounds, but Paul had always been stubborn. If I attempted to dissuade him, he’d dig his heels in even further. Maybe Nico would stay in his office and I wouldn’t have to see him at all. Before Rhett, he’d left the instruction of the smaller kids to Patrick. He might revert to that now that things were different.

“So this is it, then, huh?” Paul said, glancing around as we climbed out of my truck. “Must admit, I’ve never understood the attraction of driving cars round and round a track. Doesn’t sound like you need much talent to do that. Prefer football myself. It’s a much more skillful sport.”

I rammed my teeth together before I said what I really thought. He’d only been back four days, and already every word that came out of his mouth made me want to rupture my eardrums just so I wouldn’t have to listen to him.

I’d wanted to make it up to Rhett, given how he’d struggled when Paul first disappeared, but the more time passed, the more I wondered if it was worth my sanity becoming the collateral damage in my desire to do the right thing by my son.

Rhett’s face crumpled at Paul’s denouncement. I put my arm around his tight little shoulders and squeezed him tightly. “Come on, soldier. Let’s go see Adele.”

I fired a glare over the top of Rhett’s head at Paul, who returned my angry expression with one that said he hadn’t a clue why I was shooting daggers at him. We walked to the front of the main reception building, and with every step, my heart rate escalated. I both dreaded and yearned to see Nico. Even four short days without seeing his beautiful face and that dimple I adored so much was a form of torture I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.

I pushed the door open and eased Rhett inside, leaving Paul trailing behind. And there stood Nico, a pained expression twisting his lips as he glanced over my shoulder at Paul.

“Nico!” Rhett exclaimed, wrenching free of me. Nico swung him up in the air like I’d seen him do countless times before, but this time, instead of joy pouring into my heart, an emptiness hollowed out my stomach.

“Hey, buddy. Ready to go racing?”

“Am I ever,” Rhett said. “This is my dad, by the way.”

Rhett’s almost throwaway comment surprised me and Nico both, if our wrinkled foreheads were anything to go by. I expected Rhett to proudly announce that his dad had returned, but he seemed much more interested in Nico than in Paul. Maybe Paul’s dismissive attitude toward racing had opened Rhett’s eyes a touch to the fact that his father was far from perfect.

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