Page 6 of Holding Grace

I’d been standing in front of the kitchen door, blocking her only possible means of escape. Not that she could outrun me as it was, although it wouldn’t come to that. But with me standing where I was now, at least she had an opening, a chance. Before, she’d been trapped, with a man nearly twice her size standing between her and freedom.

She’d recognized that, and it had scared her.

What had Grace been through that she’d recognized the danger in a situation like that?

Once I’d moved, Grace took a deep breath, and I watched as some of the tension drained out of her body. She stared silently down at the counter in front of her and I wondered what was going through her head.

“What happened will take a lot more than a couple minutes to explain.” She kept her eyes glued to the counter, avoiding mine, reminding me so strongly of how she’d been when she’d first started at the pub that I nearly missed her next, oh so quiet words. “I’m not sure it really matters.”

“It does to me.” I kept my tone calm, even as I fought the urge to cross the kitchen to be closer to her.

How could she think it didn’t matter to me why she’d left? Had I imagined the connection I’d thought we’d had?

“Okay. I know I owe you an explanation,” she acquiesced, the exhaustion and resignation filling her words making my heart squeeze. I wanted to wrap her up in my arms and tell her everything was going to be okay – the very last thing I could do at that moment. “I can’t do it now, though. I need to finish my shift.”

Impatient as I was, Grace had a point. She was at work, and I knew as well as anyone that she wasn’t one to shirk her responsibilities.

“Fair enough. What time are you done?”

Grace glanced up at the clock on the wall, then back down at the counter. “We’ll close about eight if we don’t have customers. If we do, we’ll stay open ‘til they’re done, whenever that is.”

I looked around the kitchen, thinking. “How about I plan to pick you up here at eight? If you still have customers, I’ll just hang out and wait for you.”

Grace hesitated, then nodded.

“Do you still have my phone number?”

She nodded again, still refusing to meet my eyes.

“Call me if anything changes, okay?”

After one more silent nod from Grace, I made myself move. It was against every instinct I had to let her out of my sight, but I had to.

I crossed to the kitchen door, then paused with my hand on it and looked back over my shoulder at Grace. I watched her, wondering if I could trust her.

If I left the diner without her, would I ever see her again?

I couldn’t leave without saying something to her, something to let her know how much I’d thought about her, what it meant to me to at least know where she was and that she was okay.

What could I say, though? I missed you so fucking much it hurt? I’ve thought about you, worried about you, every single day since you disappeared?

Both were true – and all but guaranteed to make any sane woman run for the hills. I sounded like a crazy, lovesick stalker. Connection or not, I’d been Grace’s co-worker – not her boyfriend, not even her friend with the world’s most amazing benefits.

This was not the time for Grace to learn how stuck I was on her. There was no possible way that could end well.

Still, I needed to say something to her, just in case...

I didn’t even want to think the rest of that thought.

So, I said what I could. “I’m really happy to see you again, Grace.”

She finally looked at me. She didn’t nod this time, just stood silently as her eyes filled with tears.

Seconds away from saying fuck it and crossing the room to pull her into my arms, I forced myself to push through the door and walk away from her, praying with every ounce of my soul that it wasn’t the last time I’d ever see her.

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