Page 29 of Holding Grace

“Yeah. I’m not on until later but I’m going to go ahead and head in now. I’ve got plenty to do. You?”

“No, not until tomorrow. Mercy wanted to give me a chance to settle in, which I appreciate. Not that I have much to do since you all helped me so much yesterday.”

“Maybe you could just relax today.”

I looked at Michael, eyes deliberately wide. “Right, because I’m really good at that.” It had been so long since I’d truly felt I could relax; I wasn’t sure I knew how anymore.

“Yeah, I’m not great at it either,” Michael conceded.

“I think maybe I’ll take a walk around the neighborhood. See where the office is, get the lay of the land, just get a little more familiar.”

“Sounds good.” Michael paused at the door. “I...uh...whatever you decide to do, have a good day.”

“Thanks, you, too.”

Michael watched me for a second, not returning my smile, seeming undecided, then...

“I’d like to call you tonight to check in if that’s okay. Just to make sure you’ve got everything you need. I know we still need to get Meg’s car for you, so I’ll try to coordinate with Jamey today on that.”

A little buzz swept through me at the thought that he wanted to call me. To check on me, sure, but it was something. At least I knew I’d get a chance to talk to him.

“Sure, that sounds great.”

“Okay. Talk to you later then.”

“Talk to you later.”

Michael didn’t move.

We stared at each other, time slowing, and my mind slipped back to a moment in the pub’s kitchen so many months ago when I’d just known that Michael was about to kiss me.

He hadn’t then and he didn’t now.

He stepped back, mumbled “see ya” and headed out the door, jogging down the stairs to the ground floor.

I resisted the urge to watch out the front windows to see if he sprinted to his SUV.

I sighed as I locked the door and headed for the loft stairs.

Michael was a gorgeous, thoughtful, smart, talented, hard-working man. How could I not be attracted to him?

So fine, I was attracted to him. And there seemed to be something that sparked between us now and then. And then there were the butterflies that swarmed in my stomach when he was anywhere nearby. And the thoughts about what it would be like to be even closer to him, a lot closer.

I stripped off my clothes and pulled the clip from my hair, then stepped into the shower.

The problem was, Michael was all the things I’d listed, but above all, he was a protector. I couldn’t lose sight of the fact that he saw me as a woman who needed rescuing, someone who sent all his protective instincts revving into high gear.

It was hard for me to believe that any connection I might feel between us was anything other than that – the bond between a knight in shining armor and a damsel in distress. Even when I’d worked at the pub, Michael had known I’d had trouble following me – he’d told me that himself. It was only natural that he felt the need to defend me. It was just the kind of guy he was.

I was grateful for his presence in my life, but I had to remember what this was. And most importantly, what it wasn’t. Otherwise sooner or later I’d end up with not only a badly bruised ego, but also a shattered heart.

––––––––

I WAS LOOKING FORWARD to talking with Michael that evening, but when contact came it was in the form of a text message rather than the call we’d agreed on.

Michael: Hey, if it’s alright I’ll call you tomorrow. Today has been a shit day and I won’t be very good company on a call.

Concern swamped any disappointment I might have felt.