Page 52 of The Summer List

I force a laugh. “It’s fine. I’ll live.”

We stay quiet for a few moments. I start to think I’m not getting any more information about Priya, but then Naomi sighs and starts talking again.

“Maybe if I broke some more rules, things would be better with Priya. I think maybe…I think maybe she’s tired of me, like I’m just…too much, you know? I mean, it takes so much work for me to figure out what the rules in life even are, so once I get something right, I don’t want to mess with it.”

Her eyes have gone unfocused, like she’s in one of those states where she doesn’t realize how much she’s saying. I can tell she’s kept this so bottled up it’s ready to burst out of her whether she wants to share it or not, so I stay quiet and focus on just being here for her.

“Like making a friend, for example. I had no idea how to do that, even as a little kid, and it seemed to just happen for everyone else. Then with Priya, it just…worked, somehow, so I was like, ‘Cool, I did it. It’s done. I don’t need to worry about doing it again.’ I always thought it was the same for her, but…it’s not. Turns out I did get it wrong, and I’ve been, like, suffocating her with the burden of our friendship for basically our entire lives.”

She clamps her jaw shut so tight I can practically hear her teeth grinding. Her eyes stay hazy for a few seconds before she blinks and seems to realize I’m still here. She cringes, but I shift as close as the inner tube will allow. I raise my voice so every word rings out loud and clear over the gurgle of the water.

“Nobody who is lucky enough to be your friend would ever call that a burden, Naomi.”

Her bottom lip drops open with shock, but she doesn’t look away.

“You are not too much, and whatever is going on with you and Priya is going to get sorted out. I can see how much she cares about you. You have something really special with her. Trust me, as someone who’s pretty much only had friendships of convenience my whole life, I know the real deal when I see it. You have that with her.”

By the time I’m done, Naomi’s eyes have gone so wide they’re almost perfect circles. Her bottom lip starts to shake, and I wonder if I got way too intense on her.

Then she lets out a squawk of laughter before clamping her hand over her mouth.

“Sorry,” she says from behind her fingers. “Thank you. That was so nice. Really. It’s just, you look so funny being all serious like that in a pink inner tube.”

She laughs again, and this time I join in as I consider just how weird I look wearing an inflatable tube around my boobs in a hot tub.

“Seriously,” she says once we’ve calmed down. “Thank you. That means a lot. I’m sorry I dumped all that on you.”

I hold a finger up. “Hey. No apologies. What are evening skinny dips in the hot tub for, if not dramatic life chats?”

I haven’t even finished my question before the air seems to crackle with the threat of lightning—not from the sky, but from the electric zing of the reminder that we’re currently naked, alone, and just a couple feet away from each other.

I wait for her to look away. I wait for myself to say something that will cut the tension, but all we do is stare. I watch a raindrop slide down her cheek, and I notice how much darker her hair looks when it’s wet. There’s a lock of it plastered to the side of her neck. I want to sweep it back into place. I want to feel the soft skin of her throat under my fingertips.

I want to know if she’s ever thought about kissing me.

I want to know if she’s thinking about kissing me now.

“Naomi…”

Her name tastes like rain, fresh and sweet but laced with the potential to surge and swell into something destructive.

I don’t know if I moved closer or if she did, but she’s near enough that I could count every one of her eyelashes if I wanted to.

“Naomi,” I say again, like the word is a spell I’m casting on us both.

She’s so close. I’m braced for her bare legs to bump against mine any second now. I lift my arm to smooth her hair off her neck.

The shift in my weight makes the inner tube let out a squelching noise that sounds just like a loud and drawn-out fart.

We both freeze, and then Naomi pushes away from me so hard her back slams against the wall of the hot tub.

My heart is racing so fast I’m sure it must be a health hazard, but I still force a chuckle and say, “Hey, it was the tube, not me.”

I expect her to laugh, or at least smile, but she has this horrified expression on her face that makes my skin crawl.

“Naomi? I—”

“I’m sorry,” she blurts. “I…I’m so sorry.”

---