Page 103 of The Devil Wears Tartan

“Open it,” Kenzie says softly from behind me.

I blink a few times after opening the door, waiting for my eyes to adjust to the bright sun beaming down on the building’s flat rooftop. Once I can actually see what’s waiting for me, my hands fly up to cover my mouth. I look back and forth between Kenzie and the scene in front of us, whipping my head around so fast my neck muscles screech in complaint.

“Kenzie, is that...is that...?”

Her bottom lip is tugged between her teeth, and she’s watching me with shining eyes desperate to gauge my reaction.

“Moira...” She walks past me to stand by the two people sitting at the table set up a couple metres away. They both scramble to their feet, watching me with tentative smiles on their faces. “This is my mom, and this is my brother, Chris.”

I peel my hands away from my mouth, but my feet stay planted in the doorway.

“I’m, uh, Moira,” I say in a shaky voice.

The two of them laugh, and their smiles get even wider.

“Nice to meet you, Moira,” Kenzie’s mom says. “Call me Gillian.”

She doesn’t look much like Kenzie. Her hair is a short and wavy mouse brown peppered with grey and her features don’t have Kenzie’s sharp definition, but she’s got the same deep brown eyes and there’s something about her smile that makes it clear the two of them are family.

Chris waves at me before pushing his choppy, dyed black hair out of his eyes. “You can call me Chris, but most people call me Doctor Sly.”

Kenzie groans and elbows him in the ribs. “Literally no one calls you that.”

“I mean...” I fake a casual shrug as I step closer. “It’s never too late to reinvent yourself.”

Chris lifts his hand to snap a few times and then points at me. “I like her already.”

I chuckle and then shift my attention to Kenzie, and my words hit different when I see the mix of hope and nerves on her face.

We’ve reinvented ourselves these past few months. We’ve reinvented us. We’ve gone from lifelong rivals to lifelong rivals who sometimes make out to two people with the ability to both fill and break each other’s hearts.

Today might be the day we put them back together and fill them up again.

“May I, uh, ask what we’re doing on a roof?” I say. “I mean, it’s a lovely roof, but I’m still a bit confused by our location.”

“Well...” Kenzie looks down at the table set up with a white cloth, an insulated coffeepot, and a few white porcelain mugs. For the first time, I notice the platter in the middle stacked with brownies. I almost burst out laughing then and there. “I realized we never actually got to decide the winner of our brownie competition, and then I thought...I don’t want to compete with you anymore. I don’t want to fight or try to prove who’s better. I don’t...I don’t want to do anything to hide how much you mean to me ever again.”

My breath catches, and my heart starts to pound again. I see Chris flash her a covert thumbs-up. She sweeps her hand out to gesture at the brownies and clears her throat.

“So these are truce brownies. They’re also...promise brownies. They’re also apparently the best brownies in the entire Ottawa Valley. My mom is an old friend of the owner here, and when she called her to order the batch I was going to give you, they got to talking, and this whole...situation got set up.”

She looks around the rooftop, and I do the same, really taking it in for the first time. There are a bunch of cardboard boxes stacked by the door and a coffee can filled with cigarette butts, but the place has sweeping views of the Château Laurier hotel’s old-fashioned elegance on one side and the quaint shops and covered stalls of the Byward Market on the other.

“I wanted to make this moment special,” Kenzie continues, “but I also want you to know...my life isn’t made up of rooftop views and private dining. It’s not always picturesque. It’s messy and complicated, and I’ve got so much baggage to sort through, but still, it’s my life. It’s me. It’s all of me, not just the parts I think are good enough for people to see, and I want to lay it out for you. If you...if you want, then I want to invite you into it. That’s why Mom and Chris are here.”

She pauses to glance at the two of them, and I see the pride they feel for her. I see their love. Life has handed them more than it’s ever lain on my family, but that hasn’t stopped them from finding just as much love.

“I’m done feeling ashamed,” Kenzie says, her eyes back on me, “and I’m done believing in perfect. I’m done believing I can make anything perfect. I can’t, and it’s been driving me insane to try for so long. I’ve lost out on so much because of it, and I...I hurt you because of it.”

Her voice cracks, and my hands ache to reach for her, but I need to hear the rest.

“I wasn’t ready to believe you could be there for me. I wasn’t ready to give up control and let someone help for once in my goddamn life, but I’m changing.” She looks at Gillian and Chris again. “We are changing. Things are getting better for all of us, and I’m learning to trust that.”

She comes around the table and walks over to stand in front of me, close enough that I can make out the spray of freckles dusting her nose.

“I trust you, Moira. I know you were doing what you thought was the right thing, and I’m sorry I was so cold to you. I’m sorry I shut you out. I’m sorry I did what felt safe instead of what felt right. I was hurting so much...about everything. I still am, but I’m not going to use pain as an excuse to cut myself off again. It will be difficult. Really difficult. It will take time to let go of everything I’ve spent my whole life believing, but I’m ready to change, and if you...if you still feel anything for me, I was wondering if maybe someday you’d like to give this another chance.”

A warm breeze rustles our clothing, and I watch it toy with the ends of her hair. My heart feels about ready to burst through my ribs, too full of emotion for my body to contain it. I’ve had plenty of triumphs in my life. I’ve walked onstage to receive more medals than I can count, but none of them ever filled me up like this.

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