Page 72 of Man On

Another tear that I watch as if outside my body. Maybe none of this is actually happening. Maybe this whole day, week, month has been a hallucination. Maybe all these last years have been some kind of dream, and I'm still trapped there.

I don't want all of this to have never happened. Tomorrow I might feel differently when reality comes back. I kind of hope it doesn't. Maybe I could testify if I was floating outside my body the whole time. I could just lay out the facts without fear of judgment or pity. Without the looks and soft voices whispering when they think I can't hear.

"Noah?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't treat me differently. When you figure it all out, I mean."

"I promise."

The bed jostles, and I'm vaguely aware that I’m not in my room. It’s warm and comfortable. Although it was warmer with my weighted blanket.

I flinch as something warm and wet slides over my skin.

"There's my blanket," I mumble through my sleepy haze.

A low chuckle. "Just cleaning you up so you don't freak out when you wake up."

"Hmm. Good point."

The warmth slides over my sleeping dick, and it twitches to life. Little shivers of pleasure work their way into my psyche, pulling me a little further from slumber.

"Shhh, don't encourage me," Noah says, but I don't think he's talking to me.

I crack an eye open. It's dark aside from a faint light glowing from the hallway. Noah is crouched over my lower half, wiping me from navel to thigh with a wet towel as he raises a warning brow at my semi.

"Are you talking to my dick?"

"Maybe. Mind your business. Go back to sleep."

I chuckle, pushing myself up on my elbows. "I feel like you and my dick might need a chaperone," I say. "I can't trust you two together. Or you three, I guess." I look pointedly at his lower body. If my penis is a person in this equation, his would be too. I attempt to scowl at it, but he's wearing pants and when I scrunch my face, my eyes just want to stay shut.

"Still loopy, I see. Are you sure you didn’t take anything?"

"Nah, just too tired to freak out. I'm saving it for tomorrow." Noah chuckles and tosses the towel into a basket. All of our wet clothes from earlier look to be in it. "Did you clean something? Maybe I am high. Did you drug me?"

"Didn't want you to overdo it when your scheduled meltdown happens."

A huff escapes me as I fall back on the pillows. "Cocky brat."

"Watch who you call cocky," he says, pointing at my nearly hard dick. "Do we need to address the elephant dick in the room? Because, Good Lord dude..."

"You seem to handle it pretty well." My dick twitches, and Noah eyes it again.

"Don't taunt me," he says to it. "Now isn't the time."

"What's wrong with now?" I say, fighting to keep my eyes open.

"Don't take this the wrong way," he says. "I know you're not actually drunk or stoned or anything, but you're also clearly not in your right mind. I'm not trying to, like, take advantage here."

"Since when?" I ask, lifting an eyebrow, which probably isn't very effective given that my eyes are mostly closed. He replies with an unamused huff.

“Tell you what, if you’re still fucked up in the morning, we'll reevaluate, and I'll blow you. And if you wake up in a dark place, spiraling because of everything that happened today… I'll blow you."

I laugh again, feeling the heaviness of sleep pull me under again. "Sounds like a win-win.”

"The fact that you are seeing it that way is proof you're not right," he says softly, covering me with a blanket.

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