Page 42 of Fixation of the Mind

“Understood. I will relay the message.” Just those few words took everything out of me, every ounce of control I had in this body.

“Good.”

There was silence on the line after that, so he must’ve put me on mute while he talked to someone else. He was too full of himself to let dead air sit otherwise.

I waited, taking the opportunity to calm myself down as fast as possible… until his voice came booming back, growling his frustration. “Fuck that Ricci woman! How much more humiliation is she planning to bestow on me?!” Not knowing what Maria had done, I silently sent her thanks for making him so upset.

“Rion!”

“Yes, Uncle.”

“You remember the deal we struck, right? The past three years haven’t caused you to forget what I am capable of, correct?”

I stiffened. Memories of our eighteenth birthday flooded my mind. The cold, mold-filled air clogging up my lungs, the smell of blood, the sight of his steady knife poised at Ravi’s throat. The thin red line became more prominent once he began to push the blade in. I was incapacitated, tied to a chair, while my brothers were drugged and bound on the sewer floor. My mind and body were so tired from passing the test that I would’ve said yes to anything to save their lives.

“Yes.”

His cold, hard voice ordered, “Repeat. It.”

I swallowed hard, my voice coming out shaky. “I am only allowed to be the face of the family. Even after the naming ceremony, where I will be called head of the Ambros family, it will be your will and your wants coming from my mouth. In return, you won’t tell Foedus about me and my brothers, ensuring that we won’t die but we live as one person, R. Ambros.”

A pleased sigh came from his side of the line. “Yes. Just remember that if you want to secure you and your brothers’ lives.”

Roux and Ravi entered the room, and my eyes narrowed on them. “I understand, Uncle. We all understand.”

Another flip of his personality, and he was yelling on the phone like everything was my fault. “Send me progress on the Rose bitch and remember what I want! Get it done!” The phone clicked, and I took a long, tired exhale before putting the phone down.

Talking to him always made me feel like a piece of my soul had been stained by his putrid stink.

The three of us were far from pure, far from good or nice. I couldn't even describe us as fair. Our souls had darkened with each act, each sin we committed, but for some reason, his darkness was worse. While we were the demons in the background, doing his bidding, we still had a guiding light, a center. Our uncle had no loyalty to anything or anyone but himself, and all he wanted was to consume and taint whatever his greedy hands could touch.

Lifting my hands, I used two fingers to massage the sides of my pounding head. Talking to him was really taxing on the body.

“What the fuck did that asshole want?” Roux’s voice boomed, and I glared at him. Fucking brute, you’re just making my headache worse.

“He wanted some input on the next set of training.” Glancing at Ravi, I knew this was going to be hard for him. “He wants you to replicate ours.” Ravi’s eyes widened. “And that's not all.” Roux threw up his arms, turning away like he couldn’t look at me while he heard the words I needed to deliver next. “He also wants it to be somewhere he can see that it's being done right.”

Ravi’s face paled, and I felt bad for him. If I had known this was how it was going to work, I would've taken this job for him, but our uncle had always been able to tell the difference between us.

“I hope you told him to fuck off!” Roux yelled before he glanced over at silent Ravi. His gaze softened when it landed on our brother, his pity evident, before he turned back to me and yelled again. “Well, what the fuck did you do, mister smartypants? Huh?!”

Turning away, I leaned against the desk. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to save Ravi, save Rin from this test. The headache I was trying to calm down only pounded harder. What the fuck could I do? How could we get out of this?

My fists clenched against the desk. Think, Rion, fucking think! Get the people you care about out of this.

“Well, Rion?! What’s the fucking plan?!”

Roux’s voice grated along my skull, making the growing headache worse. The darkness inside was building and building, taking advantage of my loose control because I was thinking about other things.

“Are you fucking listening to us?!”

I grabbed my glass and threw it, aiming carefully so it didn’t hit Roux, but sent a message. It flew right next to his face as a warning before it shattered on the wall.

“I’m fucking thinking!” Roux's mouth fell open, looking at the shards of glass on the floor then back to me.

“It's not that simple! He… He…” I didn't want to say it, didn't want to remind them of that time we were all so vulnerable, so weak. We had promised not to talk of that moment, but to get through this, I would need to bring it up.

“He what, Rion?” Ravi’s unnaturally calm voice had Roux and me looking at him. For once, his face held no smile. There were no hints of jokes or fun, just still and serious.

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