Page 29 of A Love of Wrath and Rapture

“No, no. He’s…” Evangeline pulls a strange face as she shakes her head. “He had nothing to do with what happened between me and my settlement. He was cast out long ago. I don’t know how he’s survived in the mountains for so long.”

“Your settlement,” I whisper. These words are so strange to me. And the terrain confuses me, too. How long have I been asleep and away from the world? “What happened?”

“It’s a long story. I don’t think you’d be that interested in hearing what’s happened to me.”

“I am very interested in everything about you, Evangeline,” I say plainly. Her wide eyes lift up to meet my gaze and I’m filled with a warmth I’ve never known. “You saved me. You’re the reason why I’m breathing this air again. I am indebted to you.”

She shakes her head again. Then, she starts breathing heavily as she turns away. Hiding her face from me, she tries to retreat towards the trees, but I follow her. I don’t want to leave her. What if another creature decides to attack?

“Please, I never wanted any of this,” she whispers. “This is all a mistake! I lost everything. I lost my friends, my home… I don’t want this. Please, don’t follow me. Just let me die alone.”

“Never.” I shake my head firmly. Why is she asking me to do such a horrible thing? “I will never leave you.”

“Why?” she exclaims. “This was a mistake! I don’t want this!”

She’s a confusing, strange creature. Just as she is beautiful, she’s as much of an enigma. Why does she believe these things about herself? Why does she feel so unworthy of life? It doesn’t matter if she’s lost everything else.

She has me. I’m all she needs.

“You underestimate yourself and your strength, Evangeline.”

“Gods, how do you even know my name?” she whispers, closing her eyes. “This must be a nightmare.”

“I was cursed by a dark elf,” I explain. This catches her attention. “Long ago, my race was at war with the dark elves. We underestimated their strength and their affinity towards cruelty.”

Evangeline blinks slowly. She’s taking in my words. Finally, it seems as if I’m getting through to her.

“They killed the Astreldi indiscriminately. Everyone I ever knew was dead in an instant. My friends, my family, even my lovers… They were all gone. And I was left with nothing. By some cruel twist of faith, the dark elves didn’t kill me. Instead, they cursed me into a slumber that kept me frozen underground for years.”

“That’s…” Evangeline frowns deeply. “I’m sorry. I always knew that the dark elves were a bunch of cruel, evil bastards, but I never knew they’d be capable of something so sinister.”

“Never underestimate your enemy, Evangeline,” I warn. “You’ll never know what kind of devious tricks they’re waiting to unleash upon you.”

Shaking my head, I continue.

“For so long, I’ve been stuck underground in an endless slumber. The world moved on from the Astreldi. I can hardly recognize most of this terrain anymore. My clan and I, we used to hunt through these mountains, but I’m seeing sights and creatures that I don’t recognize. It’s all so strange to me.”

My eyes drift towards our surroundings. The blue sky, the jagged mountaintops, the tall trees that poke into the clouds. So much of this is different, I can hardly understand it.

“I didn’t think I would ever awaken. But you were the one who managed it. I don’t understand how you overpowered the dark elf’s curse, but you did it. You saved me.”

“I… I uttered the ancient words of a hymn or spell. I didn’t think anything would come of it. Like I said, it was an old rumor. I was only playing around. I… Fuck, I messed everything up.”

“You didn’t mess anything up. You saved me. Why are you acting as if that’s no feat?”

“It’s not to me!” Evangeline shouts, her voice echoing amongst the trees. “I was thrown out of my home because my settlement believed that I was summoning a monster! And they were right! Gods, they were fucking right. I can’t believe this…”

Evangeline starts breathing heavily through her words. I can feel the anger and frustration radiating off of her small body. I’m more connected with her than I originally thought.

Extending my arm towards her, I offer a hand. I want her to take it. I want her to accept me for who I am, but she must do so out of her own volition.

And if she doesn’t? And if she rejects you for being the monster you are? What then?

“What are you doing?” she asks, eyeing my outstretched arm. “Are you going to hurt me?”

“I would never do such a thing,” I reply. Why is she such a complicated creature? Why can’t she understand that I now live and breathe for her? “But I want you to come with me.”

Evangeline stares at me in silence. She doesn’t move, but she doesn’t react to my words, either. I would love to understand what she is thinking about at this very moment. So many of my questions would receive their immediate answers.

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