Then I positioned myself so my head was hanging upside down as I smoked. A nice changeup.

The devils snored.

The room was upside down.

I counted how long I could go without blinking.

Fourteen minutes and five seconds. Six seconds. Seven seconds.

Time flew by.

The world was shadowy.

BANG, the door was flung open.

I groaned as I lost count. Now I’d have to start over.

Two demons and a human sauntered inside, and they stank of cigarettes, booze, and sweat.

Vegar and Zenith fell onto their bed in a tangle of limbs and smacking lips.

Young love. Not relatable.

A flying projectile hit me out of nowhere, and the impact cracked my head at an awkward angle.

I broke my neck and died.

The end.

Story over.

I wish.

“You’re finally back!” John bounced up and down on my bed aggressively and rattled my dislocated neck bone. “I’ve been losing my mind with worry.”

The depressive ambiance I’d spent hours carefully cultivating was ruined, and now I’d have to start wallowing all over again. Still, warm relief exploded in my sternum.

John was okay.

“What ya thinking about?” John asked with a grin.

“How much I hate you.” I narrowed my eyes. “Wait, weren’t you tied up? How did you get out? I’ve also been worried. It’s been days.”

“The servants freed me. Then Lyla healed me and made us all wait in a separate room until Lothaire got back. I think she forgot about us though.” John ruffled my curly hair, and his dimples disappeared as he became serious.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “How long have you been back, my little Smurf bestie?”

I shook my head because I didn’t want to upset him. “I just got back. I’ve been fine. Nothing really happened.”

Disturbing events in my life were frankly not surprising or special enough to be worth noting.

John narrowed his eyes like he didn’t believe me.

I squirmed under his scrutiny.

Horse must have sensed my unease, because he made a show of pecking at John’s eyeballs.

“Good Horsey.” I gave him air kisses. “Mommy loves you.”