Page 70 of Last Dance, Second Chance

“That was cute.”

“She wouldn’t have done that if she didn’t like and trust you.”

“I guess not,” she said. “I’m enjoying spending more time with them. I know I was nervous about today, but it’s been really fun. Thank you for organising so much of it and driving us around.”

“Not a problem, though they’ve completely worn me out! I don’t know how your brother and Molly do it.”

“Me too! I’m going to fall into bed tonight.”

“I’ll miss you in my bed,” said Nathan, bending down and kissing her lips.

“I’ll miss you too,” said Jessica smiling.

Nathan checked the pizzas. “I think these are done. I’ll tell the horde.”

Jessica’s phone rang in her pocket. Distracted, and thinking it was probably Molly wondering how everything was, she answered it quickly, not checking who was calling.

“Hi, Jessica!” said the familiar voice of her friend Bethany. “I haven’t heard from you for ages and I had like literally five minutes between rehearsals so thought I’d call and have a quick catch-up. I’ve missed you! How’s that poor foot?”

“Hi, Bethany, it’s good to hear from you. Give me just a second.” Jessica’s gut wrenched at the reminder of what she was missing out on in New York. The children came into the kitchen with Nathan. Jessica gestured to her phone and hobbled out on one crutch into the sitting room for some quiet.

“Sorry about that,” Jessica said, resuming the phone conversation. “I’m looking after my nephew and nieces today. My foot’s still sore, still in plaster.”

“What a pain for you. Still, at least you get a rest,” said Bethany. “We’re all so exhausted. Jean-Paul is pushing us so hard with the choreography. Gabriel has been in an absolute grump for the last week.”

Jessica knew her friend wasn’t being intentionally hurtful, but it was really hard to hear what she was missing out on. It should be her dealing with Gabriel’s strops and complaining about Jean-Paul. “Any idea when you’ll be back?” Bethany continued. “It feels like you’ve been gone for ever and I could really do with your help with the Rose Adage — it’s a bit of a mess at the moment.”

“Sorry, I’m not sure. I haven’t rebooked my flight yet. But I’ll let you know when I do. I’d better go. I think one of my nieces needs me,” she lied.

Jessica felt guilty. It was such an exciting opportunity for her friend and she wanted to support her, but she didn’t think she could keep up her cheerful tone any longer.

“OK! I’ll message you some footage and maybe you could send me some feedback,” said Bethany. “Bye!”

Jessica turned her phone off and went back into the kitchen, attempting to plaster a smile on her face.

“What’s the matter?” asked Nathan as soon as she stepped into the room.

“Nothing,” Jessica said. “I’m fine. It was my friend calling from New York.” She sat down at the table and began serving herself with food.

Nathan was distracted by Sophie calling out, “Look, Nathan! I can fit a whole slice of pizza in my mouth in one go!”

But Jessica noticed Nathan kept a careful eye on her for the rest of the meal.

* * *

The phone call from Bethany had reignited Jessica’s determination that she would dance professionally again, as soon as possible.

Bethany messaged the videos as promised. Her friend had been right that she needed help with the Rose Adage — she was struggling with the extended balances en pointe, and while the rest of her technique was good, her performance lacked emotion and the spark that would hook the audience. This was something Jessica knew she could help with, even if it would be far easier to do so in person. She took meticulous notes and messaged her friend back, offering a video call in the dance studio so she could give her some direct feedback.

Jessica knew that she had to be very careful with her foot, but she upped the exercise she was doing with the other parts of her body, breaking up her exercise routines with working on her blog.

She wrote a blog post about her injury, not about how she was staying in shape or her rehab, she’d write that later, but about the mental impact an injury could have on a dancer. How emotional it felt not to be able to do the things you loved most in the world, and not to know whether you’d ever be able to dance at the same level again. She was close to tears as she hit publish, but she was really pleased she’d done it; it felt cathartic to get her feelings out there and she hoped that maybe her post might help someone else who was struggling to understand that they weren’t alone.

* * *

Jessica was finishing off a kettlebell workout in her mum and dad’s sitting room a couple of days later when her phone started ringing. She glanced down at it and saw Bethany’s name flashing on the screen. She ignored it. She felt bad. She wanted to support her friend, but it was still hard not to feel jealous and resentful sometimes, especially when she was exercising as best as she could with her injury. She’d call her back later. She really wasn’t in the mood to talk now. A moment later a notification showed up that she had a voicemail message. She completed her workout and then listened to it:

“Hi, babe, it’s Bethany. Why didn’t you tell me you have a Substack? Your post about dance injuries is being shared all over Instagram! We all love it!”

---