Page 18 of The Baby Plan

She put Alana to bed and then went downstairs to join Samson. She was a little apprehensive as she approached the kitchen: would things be awkward without Alana there? Would they have anything left to talk about, or would they sit in silence as they ate their meal as quickly as possible?

She needn’t have worried. Samson seemed very happy to chat about Sophie’s favourite subject, Alana, and was clearly continuing his efforts to help her feel relaxed.

The risotto was delicious and Sophie thoroughly enjoyed being cooked for twice in one day. “Who taught you to be so handy in the kitchen?” she asked between mouthfuls.

“My mum. She was determined that when I left home I’d know how to make myself a decent meal. Personally, I think it was so she could get me cooking for everyone once a week and claim it was for my own good.”

“Well, I for one am very grateful to her.”

“Me too deep down — it does come in handy.”

“I’m rubbish in the kitchen,” admitted Sophie. “Thank goodness for jars of baby food.”

Their conversation was interrupted by some snuffles down the baby monitor. It was much more sensitive than the cheap model her sister had and had a screen so they would see what Alana was up to, which was a little disconcerting if Sophie were honest. It was amusing to see how wriggly her niece was once they thought she was all settled though.

Samson appeared mesmerised by his daughter’s antics, but finally managed to pull his attention away from it. “Sorry,” he said, “I can’t seem not to watch, maybe the screen is a little much.”

“You really want to do your best for her, don’t you?” said Sophie quietly. Seeing him in this light made her consider what a brilliant ally Samson could be, someone who could help and support her with the enormous, and sometimes frankly overwhelming, task of bringing up Alana.

“Yes, I do. I feel terrible I missed out on the first part of her life.”

“It doesn’t sound like it was entirely your fault,” Sophie said, fairly.

“Natasha must have had some reason for not telling me when she found out she was pregnant. Some reason why she thought I shouldn’t know, and she and Alana would be better off without me.”

“Maybe it wasn’t anything to do with you. Maybe she was confused and scared and as time went on, she didn’t know how to tell you.” Or me, Sophie mused. Not that she was prepared to tell Samson that.

“Perhaps,” he said, not sounding convinced.

“Well... we’ll never know the reason. But she was very independent and liked to do things her way.”

“She certainly did,” said Samson with a smile.

Sophie felt an unexpected surge of jealousy at the thought of Natasha and Samson together but did her best to shake it off. How could she be jealous of someone who was dead? And of her own sister?

They washed and tidied up together once they’d finished eating, but Sophie was very careful to keep her distance physically. It was way too confusing when they got too close to each other.

“I’ve got some stuff on a building project I’m working on which I ought to do if you’re OK?”

“Of course, don’t worry about me!” Sophie said immediately. She was secretly glad to have some time to herself to process exactly what had happened that day. Part of her was worried she’d acted too hastily and needed to be reassured by going over the options again in her head.

“You’re very welcome to use my Netflix account if you want to commandeer the television,” Samson offered.

Actually, Sophie thought, she’d love to relax in front of the TV, but she’d feel weird doing it in Samson’s home. She wasn’t comfortable enough there yet.

“No thanks, I think I’ll finish sorting out my room and have a read and an early night. It’s been a busy day.”

“Sure. You know where I am if you need me,” said Samson, “Do you want to take the baby monitor?”

“If you don’t mind,” she said. “Alana doesn’t tend to wake in the night, thankfully.”

“I guess I missed the months of night feeds,” Samson commented.

“Yeah...” She had no idea what to say in this situation and was grateful when Samson spoke.

“Anyway, sleep well, I guess I’ll see you in the morning.”

Sophie went up to her room and fiddled around putting away the last of the things she’d brought with her. Then she got out her laptop, planning to do some research into some freelance work, but it was only when she had the computer all set up and had got comfortable on the bed with it that she realised she didn’t have the Wi-Fi password. She umm-ed and ah-ed, but couldn’t bring herself to interrupt Samson. She closed down her laptop and read until she heard him moving around, going to the bathroom and then into his bedroom. She put on her pyjamas and snuck out to use the bathroom herself, pausing by Alana’s door, but deciding, as much as she’d like to see her niece, it wasn’t worth risking waking her up.

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